2.2036 : 11/29/2010 : Cheat

Yeah I can cheat
with the best of them
and who do I cheat
no not the rest of them
I cheat only myself
but I'll make it pay
just like any good day
that's every day that I get
and I'll do it up honest
yeah I'll do it right yet

what

2.2035 : 11/28/2010 : Post

Post this, post that
I'm not the type to kiss and tell
post tit, post tat
I guest that it is just as well
I guess my legs are shaky
I guess my pipes are clean
I can't be rid of you entirely
I guess that you'd know what I mean
I hope you have not exited
I hope that you've gone clean
with a brand new spanking slate
I guess that you'd know what I mean
I know of one who has exited
leaving just the glorious words
Selfish I wish he were here
instructing all us clueless nerds
I guess I heard the call he left
chain letter of the soul indeed
I guess that I must have to
play the role of the dear friend in need

what

2.2034 : 11/27/2010 : Affinity

This affinity tonight
not the best time for
feeling it's all right
to flow to drift
to not to fight
and last time all things
fell from sight
but now I'll be
a better steerer
hope a day past
things will be clearer
and I'll see
what is nearer
even if the
cost is dearer
and with that
the harder work is done
and what's left
could be took
by anyone
let go of that
can't be moved by just one
take peace
at every song left unsung

what

2.2033 : 11/26/2010 : Quit My Dreams

Desist, spectre
and quit my dreams
we were done long ago now
and it seems
that you were or became
someone better not to know
and wondering if it all was by design
I kind of think so
were you nemesis, enigma
were you muse or mentor?
human counterpart for
everything I never really went for?
were you just a charlatan
out for your own amusement
all with a slightly brutal edge
odd rumors of abuse lent
I don't try to figure it out
anymore, you're really gone it seems
aside from memories
and sometimes of course dreams

what

2.2032 : 11/25/2010 : New Book

Has it been a year now?
more or less
no net to look it up here
I can only guess
am I off the better part
of a whole year
there is a milestone that tells me yes
just as I fear
I come upon your new book
halfway up some other stair
and there will never be another
all that's left is there
they're already digging up the past
and putting it all on display
already ready for the museum
and I feel like it happened yesterday

what

2.2031 : 11/24/2010 : No Repeat

No repeat will I tolerate
of the performances of late
the hard temptation I will feel
convinced the moment was not real
just because I don't remember
not a week shy of december
a date I will not record
I just forgot you have my word
and soon I will not even care
as long as I don't repeat it there

what

2.2030 : 11/23/2010 : Triumph

I will declare triumph
not the luck
what is going on
I will ignore tomorrow
the crying of
th' immortal song
Someday I will try
to interpret the
action
no doubt it will
be a millennial
faction

what

2.2029 : 11/22/2010 : Human Hive

Imagine being asked so little
a little here a little there
always safe tucked in the middle
no need to shave or cut your hair
the human hive the real thing this time
it all costs a penny and takes five minutes
think up a riddle think up a rhyme
the possibilities are literally infinite
well not literally you're so literal
remembering the library of Babel and its downfall
I get depressed thinking our chances are so pitiful
and never seem to get around to start rolling the ball

what

2.2028 : 11/21/2010 : Bang

No big message
no kingdom come
no salt in the spirit
so just bang that drum
No chance of a pardon
no chance for a reprieve
no future in this joint
so you are going to have to leave
The sign above the portal
said bang bang bang
asked her what it meant
she said not much of anything
we've given up on protest
nothing to resist
the man's just a machine
and changing it's a ship we missed
so we'll stay down in this basement
least till we run out of rum
there's nothing much to do
but sit and bang that drum

what

2.2027 : 11/20/2010 : Alarm

How long will I keep
this music for my late alarm
trying to convince me to let go
trying to walk me past the harm
a whole life in one context
could I change?
shift or grow or somehow know
something past rich and strange
tied to a memory
of someone else's swell and fame
another night I sought
and felt at last I'd lost the game
before the big peak just recedes
and cools me back to starting square
I'll wrap another alarm bell ditch
and leave the question there

what

2.2026 : 11/19/2010 : Recompense

Sometimes it seems I've no defense
when I demand some recompense
for some perceived deprivation
boy do I need a vacation
from the same old stale temptation
some new start some recreation
hard not to dream of the cash
harder not to fear the crash
given what's gone down to date
my recompense must have to wait
and while I wait and age is fleeting
it's my own self I'm mistreating
it's my own time gone to waste
and as far as recompense, I've lost my taste

what

2.2025 : 11/18/2010 : Spent

And just like that
I am spent
and no idea
where it all went
or how I held it
up this long
or where I'll find
the next song

what

2.2024 : 11/17/2010 : The Feeling

Is this the feeling
the moment come?
is this the answer
truth, is this some
I'm not convinced
there's anything here
that anything's coming
that anything will become clear
I've got the feeling
the cycle turns
but it all just rolls over
and I hate the returns
and the feeling goes nowhere
and I don't know what to say
about that other stack of feelings
I would rather keep at bay

what

2.2023 : 11/16/2010 : Galaxies

Ten galaxies for every
man woman and child
I corrected for growth down here
at least for a little while
yet here we are with nowhere to go
no tickets and no rides
and if we mess this rock ball hard enough
the price will come out of our hides
The glory mostly in our heads
and down here getting sparser
and we're fighting deckchair patterns
the conundrum has no parser
and we'll go down clinging
the the conviction the other guys were bums
pray that there's no heaven
or we'll all have to be chums
but for now I can take it
disappointment as big as a galaxy
that we do so very little
when what's possible is plain to see
I guess we don't have the equipment
the language that could set us free
to really step into the garden
get to know our galaxy

what

2.2022 : 11/15/2010 : Swing

Swing, swing
just look at that thing
at it hanging there and swinging
can you believe the line I'm slinging?

what

2.2021 : 11/14/2010 : Early

What I'm calling early is actually late
and in the context of my intentions isn't great
nothing to to talk my way out of here
no longer waiting for anything to appear
we tell a few lies even the best of us
we fumble the math trying to claim a plus
and that sound I'm hearing is my own breath
and it's not reassuring but it's better than death

what

2.2020 : 11/13/2010 : Remember Anything

What if I don't want to
remember anything
What's the best thing to say
to forget a particular brass ring
what if nothing is changing
and nothing is in my control
and who would I be to call anyone out
for not paying the selfsame toll
I'm praying to forget
and not recall anything at all
that I'll never look back again
at a particular year's great first snowfall

what

2.2019 : 11/12/2010 : Taboo

Can't talk about this
cant talk about that
too many subjects taboo
not about morals
belief or tradition
in truth I'm just trying to impress you
Golly how foolish
what a cheap talker
trying to work magic with words
and I should be over it
I should be realistic
never to rise to the top of the nerds
choose to be cryptic
choose to stay mum
King of my own tatty pile
suppose in ten more years
I'll be a bit higher
but still feel I've missed by a mile

what

2.2018 : 11/11/2010 : Pit

There's something very wrong
with the way that I've been trying
to liberate myself from this pit
where I feel I'm slowly dying
think it might involve this shovel
something to do with the digging
but it's hard to think about it
hard when I am always wigging
can't pick a direction
I get bored and dig a little more
can't go down forever can it
has to be a bottom floor
I just want to even it out
get the bottom smooth and flat
a good place to start jumping from
yeah maybe if I weren't so fat
somebody quoted me Jack London
Something about up and out
you make it sound so easy Jackie
that wasn't what you were about
I don't know what you were about
another thing to stop and learn
but even down here in the pit
the seasons turn and turn

what

2.2017 : 11/10/2010 : Forgetfulness

Oh my forgetfulness
how easily the past is lost
forget the summer's heat
the cruel before-spring's frost
I forget the loneliness
of being all alone
I better remember quick
my sins for to atone
can't go back and fix the past
not even only yesterday
and just like in the dream I had
Forgetfulness can't hold past effort at bay
I try to tell myself
it doesn't matter if I slip a bit
but the all or nothing man inside
doesn't believe it

what

2.2016 : 11/09/2010 : Bad Things I Want

I keep it quiet but I bet you could guess
I'm not nearly so nice as my resume suggests
I want bad things you know it's really true
I might even want to do bad things with you
I keep it buttoned up oh I am so reserved
conceal my blackest heart, what I think I deserved
you'd think it colorful, you'd think it was a stunt
If I told you about all the bad things I want
I wash the dishes I take out the trash
I wash my face trim my beard and mustache
I keep my mouth shut, eyes might look a little mad
with the pressure of the wanting to do something bad
well will I ever slip let my fists unclench
will I ever let my black angel get off the bench
and run with it when you all expect me to punt
whispered instructions in his ear:
get me some of those bad things I want

what

2.2015 : 11/08/2010 : I've Got a Good Feeling About This

I've got a good feeling about this
coming collapse
the way it's going to pan out
when the infrastructure snaps
I've got a good feeling
Won't let anyone dispute
and when all others are running
I'll be still and mute
Too many bad feelings
I didn't get a fair shake
I missed some real good chances
that's the chance you have to take
but I'll get mine I'l get mine
while all others are reeling
I will stroll through chaos so serene
held up on my good feeling

what

2.2014 : 11/07/2010 : All

Done it all?
Or maybe I ain't done nothing
Not fair at all
A whole lot more than one thing
So what's missing?
Is it real or just delusion
and does that question matter
is it the source of my confusion
I know it's impossible
and no one can do it all
and I'm not even close
I stood a lot against the wall
and will I ever dance
and will I ever dance
get a little of it all
get a little take a chance

what

2.2013 : 11/06/2010 : Extension

Can't hardly think
so weary from toil
turning the crank
to tighten up the coil
be back to full extension
in less than twenty four
and I feel all right about it
and I don't want one thing more

what

2.2012 : 11/05/2010 : This Way Comes

Let me pretend
something wonderful
this way comes
ignoring the portents
the signals the drums
ignore the gross
narratives of the short sighted
and the way what was
once green is blighted
act like a solution
is well on the way
to how we found
reasons for fighting each day
and despite all indications
we'll toss out the bums
when we celebrate the wonderful
that this way comes

what

2.2011 : 11/04/2010 : Is There Something Wrong?

Is there something wrong?
well is anything right?
that's the one thing that has me struggling
every late night
as the hands crawl blindly
to the witching hour
and my black angel's evil twin
comes into his nightly power
how to resist?
when I know it's just an incident
another day will find me back to square one
and the column still bent
how can this crummy frame
hold up this crummy roof
sure I know you know there's something wrong
but can you come up with some proof?
If not I'm sorry but I'm going to hold my tongue
or I'll soon say far too much
and this day is far too young

what

2.2010 : 11/03/2010 : Middle of a Mess

Smack in the middle
of a mess I made
doing everything
better sense forbade
no wise words no
exit strategy
hope's not enough
and I think fate's mad at me
no way to fix it
no bright notions
no magic spells
and no magic potions
no benefit to
not getting caught
nothing stronger than
knowing that I ought
to do everything
that's so obvious
a tiny hedge in a
world so perilous
no way to end it
in a neat wrap up
just a day put away
another bad idea to snap up

what

2.2009 : 11/02/2010 : Good Enough

So what if my best
isn't good enough
for what? I guess
to call the bluff
of whatever it is
that runs this show
used to have a name for it
but these days I don't know
what if I check off
every box I can think up
and find it's just like every other
stage I managed to stink up
what if my best
is really mediocre
just the kind of trick
I'd expect of this joint's joker

what

2.2008 : 11/01/2010 : Pretty Smut

Even all the pretty smut
can't keep my eyes open this night
what piled up against my door wasn't pretty but
Somehow its arrangement seems right
don't know how I'm going to kill the hours
can't imagine what a new day will bring
will I dream of the forest the towers
will I remember anything

what