2.696 : 3/30/07 : Practical Exam

Aim for the practical
extract it all
apply it to
the present day
the only way
to pass through
to transcendence
After the practical exam
whatever’s left is just a sham
and if I pass
or fail
it leaves a trail
long past dependence
on a structured form
run cool or warm
react or demure
adapt to be sure
that nothing’s ever certain
persist the same
still play the game
wake on the floor
told to ignore
the thing behind the curtain

what

2.695 : 3/29/07 : Alchemy

Transformation proceeds they say
proceeds from where
the origin
divided from the
sacred stream
they called it
First principles
original sin
if I mastered alchemy
remote viewing
self hypnotism
I would force the call to come
preventing some
dull cataclysm
until then I guess
I’ll have to
grow used to my station
hoping something’s
going on proceeding
to transformation

what

2.694 : 3/28/07 : 100

How many days will pass
and then how many more?
100 days will pass and then
100 more
100 days will pass
and then 100 more
to move in no direction
what is anything good for?
100 more
and soon another year is gone
getting close again
the second thousandth song
move in no direction
wait and see
so long
100 years of solitary
going on

what

2.693 : 3/27/07 : Intent

So intent on
the gap the failing
the pit the hole
the shaky railing
my intention
I can’t recall
it anymore or
what it was at all
In the tent with
the holy of holies
praying to figure
how to pull a fast one
on the prollies
such an unGodly mission
such a hairsbreadth from a crime
I’d gladly go
the whole way down
If I weren’t scared
to do the time
So instead I cool my heels
wait for a message
heaven sent
or failing that
a pointed push
or failing that
intent

what

2.692 : 3/26/07 : Your Life

Sometimes the sounds of necessity
drill into your head like pure anger
close eyes and count to infinity
drive the needle back from red danger
all the paths the switchback turnings
dodging the bullets and wielding the knife
tell yourself it’s all leading somewhere
tell yourself this is not your life
I get used to all the noise and static
the drone of endless vigilance
I get inured to the lost and erratic
random walk of circumstances
I put it all on this number, that one
it never amounted to much though
it always sounded like a plan would be fun
but I always broke down to touch and go
I should be happy with all I’m given
what pathetically passes for strife
but if it were you wouldn’t you like me
ache for there to be more to your life

what

2.691 : 3/25/07 : Grind

2,883 : 5 ?



What a wonderful innovation
the grind seemed
after we uselessly
sought after beauty
and knowledge and
after we uselessly dreamed
What a palimpsest diary
revised and eradicated
What an illusion
of industry I predicated
on a thought
that turned out to be
all rot
fit only for the grind
and clearly nothing special
just endless days
and this fresh hell

what

2.690 : 3/24/07 : Wicked

Wicked substandard gentile apostate
nonquality poor convert low worldly reprobate
why am I tortured with
a little knowledge
why am I tortured with
a little spark
why am I plagued with
ambiguous ambition
why am I still left in the dark
anger is a poison
desire is a trick
jealousy’s the devil’s snare
but you, Lord wield the stick
the irony is
things would not be
better off without me here
and that’s truly the only reason
I don’t elect
to disappear
 
what

2.689 : 3/23/07 : Couldn’t Hurt

It couldn’t hurt
to pretend to be hopeful
It couldn’t hurt
to fake a smile
it couldn’t hurt to try
to testify
and go the extra mile
there’s no excuse
for not just trying
no excuse
for going graceful
Sure I’ve heard
you’re never dressed without a smile
so here’s a facefull
Sure I’ve heard
you fake it till you make it
smash my head
against the wall
regrets I’ve had
a barrel of them
heading over the big falls
While I sort this nonsense out
permit me one small boon
let me suffer in the
ignorant belief
that something has to come up soon

what

2.688 : 3/22/07 : Bad

True it’s bad
could be worse
probably will be
someday
sure I’m sad
but that’s the curse
cure’s the hearse
as we’ll all see
I’d say

what

2.687 : 3/21/07 : Mad

I had a little
set back
it made me mad
I had to feel like
as if
I’d been had
What I’ve been
looking for looking for
I do not see at all
I don’t even know
what it was
or who I thought would call

what

WRT: Profanity

The issue of "bad words" is an open one, to my mind, and a complicated one.  One of the problems (and it's far from the only one) with content warnings is that you can't rely on them.  I've decided to note in my public sharing of song postings when one is what I deem profane, and I've also added a tag for this content, but at the end of the day anyone can drill right into the raw content of the song of the day via an errant search.  I've thought about marking the content as adult in Blogger but that forces every visitor to click through a warning screen and I dislike that.

To a large extent my attitude is that, you know, the internet has bad words on it and anyone who wants to use it is just going to have to deal with that.  The other side of this is that I never think it's a bad thing to provide more information about such issues and so that's what I've done.  It will be a very long time (at current rates of progress) before I catch up with all the archives though so the "profane" tag must be considered in no wise comprehensive.

I will say I seem to be becoming less prone to lean on shocking words, why the other day I even changed the title at "It's Rome, Baby!", my museum of a 20 year retrospective sampling of self-generated text, 1986 - 2006.  For years I'd been calling it "This is your brain on Fucking Crazy".

Don't say I didn't warn you.

what

2.686 : 3/20/07 : Fake Book

I need a fake book
not just for the songs but
for the whole thing
For what I make book
think that there’d be something
in it some bell would ring
What’s a call
if there’s no one to be calling
What’s this price
it was not me who did the
falling
Put it in the fake book
just another play
on words mighty as
atom bombs
now the gloves are off
they’re calling
frigid cunts and
uncle toms
I’ve got my fake book
write another chapter
on illusion
cut off quite sudden
knowing all the time that
it will just add to the
confusion

what

2.685 : 3/19/07 : Flown To

Flown to the
winged seed that’s grown to
the tree that was
blown to hell and gone
for a thing called
you and me
the goldfinches are
background
and there’s still a few
red squirrels
left in this town
midnight’s strike
will tear off that
wedding gown
and wherever you get left
is just where you’ll be
and I’ll laugh at you
staked out on the lawn
like a suburban sacrifice
or maybe I’ll just yawn
it’s a lie that things are
darkest before the dawn
but I won’t argue that point
frankly

what

2.684 : 3/18/07 : Push On to March

2,875 : 13 ?



When every foundation is turned to chalk
dissolved in an acidic tide
yet all that there is
is what ever was
as long as this world that was
let be abides
Push on again Andromachene
March to the pulse of the machine
Until the sweet release
of heaven’s falling:

When iron extinguished the heart of a star
exploded in silver and gold
gave birth to a scion
ringed ‘round with nine
but only one’s story can now be told

You’ve come so far now
little seed
Push on to march
melee and bleed
Until to earth
like each achene
before you

what

2.683 : 3/17/07 : Strange Dreams

If this is not the voyage
then I’m never going on it
there’s no room left for avoidance
there’s no way to get beyond it
I’m just blue because I’m sick
and when I sleep I have strange dreams
that leave me pondering a schism
where nothing is where it seems

what

2.682 : 3/16/07 : Designer for the Stars

How little they require
a sphere of fusion
evolution of fire
teach me how to draw
I’ll draw my bars
I’m just a pinprick of light
designer to the stars

what

2.681 : 3/15/07: Too Sick to Dance

Too sick to dance
this dance around
the losing hope
and losing ground
I can’t tell if it’s
real or just
the sickness that
erodes all trust
what a weak faith
oh damn my eyes
too sick to hope
for a surprise

what

2.680 : 3/14/07 : Daydream

I was dreaming about
my friend who’d gone free
how he spotted the big one
and the first one he called was me
how we hooked a notion
such a sure thing
we started our work
with a vacation
if it sounds very familiar
well it’s all just variation
on a daydream
half awake
in some tent
on some school break
and I’m a boy again
of twelve or ten
listening to
nature’s morning
my own personal
dawn of time
before I did the time
for doing the crime
that’s how it appeared to me
in the middle of my daydream
about my friend
who had gone free

what

2.679 : 3/13/07 : Stumbling Block

Don’t have much expectation of
a real fair shake
And having grown inured to
all the liberties you take
but even I in all my bitter
skeptic’s garb am shocked
to see that only you can
be held liable for my stumbling block
I guess I’m crazy to expect
because I ought that then you will
and now to mention it was you
who quipped thou shalt not kill
And I’ve heard all the arguments
exotic dumb and stock
And me I just look stupid
sitting puzzling over my stumbling block
Imagine I’ll get past it
someday after the harm’s all done
since I refuse to choose attack
or bow to the way of the gun
my stumbling blocks may become
steps that get me over the wall
But I must carry them so far
to someplace I can’t see at all


what

2.678 : 3/12/07 : Ongoing Investigation

Our ongoing investigation
has revealed an anomaly
which appears as the face
of a messiah on a grilled cheese
served between the homage
and the homily
And in a study of a thousand
visitations of the Holy Spirit
not once did a thing show up
in the pictures
we examined them twice
applied mercury and ice
left the evidence
hanging from the fixtures
Our ongoing investigation
suggested people only
half expect prayer to work
but we’re well pleased to say
when we took the household
icons away
more than half reported
that they felt a little
jerk

what

2.677 : 3/11/07 : The Letter

I started the letter
finished starting past midnight
another distraction
another other dim light
yet the letter
might save your life
don’t forget intent
is fortune’s wife
I’m not going to
break the code for you
And knowledge is a
heavy load it’s true
it’s just a memo
a note in time
a little reminder
a missive
a rhyme

what

2.676 : 3/10/07 : Vanguard

The velvet invasion will be
dull as dirt
get a little more stingy
watch the man lose his shirt
it’d be a shame to waste all that
concept of capital
why not sweep in with the vanguard
why not have it all
I’ve dreamed my perfect revolution
in a thousand subtle turnings
while I piled up more IOUs
and the ministry of love
docked my earnings
but hell us early adopters
always gotta pay the vanguard tax
sometimes get a fat IPO back
sometimes get stuck with the betamax
I couldn’t even tell you
if I really believe any of it now
it seems just too convenient
it could be both a cash and a sacred cow
I wonder what will really happen
when your great object meets our blunt force tip
I guess we’ll find out by and by
how paradox impacts our vanguard trip

what

2.675 : 3/9/07 : Retreat

The flashing images entice me
to a great last stand in vain
But the yarrow sticks assure
that in retreat there’s certain gain
A whole life’s opportunity
might lurk in every day
constrained by the tragic math
the little we can see or say
Fool enough to act as if
this one is any better
elect not to move an inch
record this morsel write this letter
seems certain enough the great work
will stay buried in the ground
until I find the treasure map
until I find the workaround

what

2.674 : 3/8/07 : Scratch

It’s a perfect example
of the way I think
don’t take the time to do a proper sample
when I’m on the brink
follow the stupid money
don’t take the good advice
convinced some luck or destiny
will save me from
the hidden-in-plain-sight price
so what’s another
couple hundred failures in a box
when you believe
beyond all reason
in the key that opens all locks
and that’s how I generate
another page
of not quite up to scratch
God help you all if you are still
waiting for that
ancient egg to hatch

what

2.673 : 3/7/07 : It

This could be it nobody knows
nobody knows
the bus the bomb the asteroid
everything eventually blows
and this was not supposed to be
another inquiry on elegy
that record’s in the can already
Was this meant to inspire
some change some catching fire
and why do you inquire
I can’t escape this serpent turning in
the thoughts white hot keep burning in
what if I’ve tapped the best of it
and now it’s just the rest of it
every cool trip’s been speculated
by a wilder mind than mine contemplated
and I’m not even a real genius very
dubious to call myself a visionary
I’ll pretend I’m caught up
there’s no real chance
Always five steps
behind the dance
And if I succumb
to circumstance
will you spare me a dime
sometimes a glance?

what

2.672 : 3/6/07 : Lack of Reward

Lack of reward
a devilish riddle
I want my cookie
like a little lickspittle
doing for doing
for doing’s own sake
what’s my motivation
I have no stake
I’ve got a twisted idea
about enlightenment
I’m half resigned to living
in this existential tenement
but I could win through all
being angry, frightened, bored
if I could just work out this knot
the devilish riddle
of lack of reward

what

2.671 : 3/5/07 : Spines

2,861 : 0 ?



We see the dragon appear in the field
it looks like a good day to meet the great man
Whatever nonsense I elect to wield
I’ll just knock it out as fast as I can
There comes a point nothing old will work
and the new seems to be bad delayed
and me I’m just sounding like such an odd jerk
and the law remains to be obeyed
suddenly tired of the dire witching hour
and seeking the neon rat maze
I’ll cut things short try to conserve my power
God knows just how many more days
I’ll be called to persist in my odd little trip
generating my ellipsis and lines
parenthetical babble and all I let slip
as I try to bequeath you all spines

what

off the bridge

Hmm, the end of volume 2.4 sort of snuck up on me there.  Volume 2.5: The Creative, starts today.

what

2.670 : 3/4/07 : Bridge to Nowhere

Musta drove about a thousand miles
and seen a thousand turnings
And as I came up on my goal
the question was still burning
over the crest of the hill
a thousand miles from the mainland
I saw its shining shining spans
and clenched the key in my hand
I’d sworn while I was mired in muck
no matter what I’d go there
and now it stretches out before me
behold the bridge to nowhere
and feeling mighty in my veins
The die and how I tossed it
I climbed behind the wheel again
and with a clear mind crossed it

what

2.669 : 3/3/07 : Maybe Real

Maybe real answers don’t come in words
Maybe evil exists merely to thin the herds
Maybe truly nobody is minding the store
I had a thousand answers I still wanted more
I’m stuck with my experience for what it’s worth
Whether I’m rooted to the spot or roam the earth
God said to the devil where you been at cat
Said up and down and back and forth how about that
nobody asks to be made an example
by nature’s light you’re just another sample
thrown into the cauldron of idiot chance
never a dull moment now dance boy dance
Maybe words aren’t much but it’s what I’ve got
Such a short stick to stir the melting pot
Maybe it’s time to just let it all go
wash out with the tides
let the words sink below

 what

2.668 : 3/2/07 : Time Tunnel

My banality makes me scream
so perfectly revealed
in the lucid dream
slouching after
easy sex or smoke
if this is volition
then free will is a joke
I dreamed we hit the time tunnel
old friend
didn’t accomplish much
but we came out
okay in the end
I guess I’m glad
we didn’t break our vow
dreaming awake, past or future
every moment is now
and were you there
a little bit somehow in spirit?
When I asked the question did you
hear it?
The time tunnel yawns then closes
I can only shake my head
at my deficiencies it exposes

what

2.667 : 3/1/07 : Change is Impossible

Change is impossible
because the universe is full
I feel it in my gravity
I feel it in the planet’s pull
I push eventuality
it coils round like a snake
it curves and coils right back at me
work equals zero for the trouble I take
spin equals zero
universe made of energy, not a drop
available to dig us out of this hole
wait for the collapse, the crunch
the pop
 
what