2.1953 : 9/07/10 : Urgency

This illusion of urgency
that comes with being human
and all the lists and circumstances
we be exhuming
it's a tale I guess
but it seems pretty stupid
pouring one remedy down
after another
I swear to God
we'll hit the right one brother
and find at last
our perfect cupid
draw back the bow let arrow fly
we won't get provoked to ask why
we'll see that bastard
hit its target
and when we're rich and fat
content with our lot
we won't question a single
minute that we've got
fuck you jack
We know we are set

what

2.1952 : 9/6/10 : Now

I can hear the alarm saying
it ought to be now
and after all these years
I still don't seem to know how
and I can't stop trying
seems it's in my bones
So I carry now around
like a cart full of stones
talking won't do it
nor writing either
maybe grit and gumption
got no stocks of neither
but I better not wait
for another shot across the bow
the sole redeeming feature
is there's nothing but now

what

2.1951 : 9/5/10 : Labor

You said you wanted a marker
I'll call this a labor of love
and admit I hate it sometimes
but admit it fits me like a glove
probably not my goldmine
and my treasure resides elsewhere
I got to give up all these fools gold nights
and find some other way to care
how will I complete my labor
not without pain and grief
and the fear that steals in stealthy
like a tricky scary thief
not without mistakes and crossings out
not without near misses
but I might just make it through
with my strand of three and a hundred kisses

what

2.1950 : 9/4/10 : Not Over

The night's not over
and I haven't beat it yet
maybe you want an answer
it's not what you're going to get
I'm not feeling myself
or else I am far too much
I'd like to wrap it gracefully
sadly it seems I lost my touch

what

2.1949 : 9/3/10 : Just Dumb

See the thing for what it is
a failure to be overcome
another sign you're not there yet
another sign that you're just dumb
don't expect much from tomorrow
don't expect a thing to change
Why would it nothing's different
another chance you just estrange
think about the ones that have left
that is not the boat you're in
expect another good long inning
add another coat of sin
You might get a little smarter
with your nose hard at the wheel
with a lot of grit and focus
dumb might just lose it's appeal

what

2.1948 : 9/2/10 : Repetition

Nothing new to say
I guess it's down to repetition
done believing in the call
done waiting for the mission
easy to see what's to do
and nothing but to do it
sure can't see an end to it
So might as well get to it
these feelings these decisions
and the whole thing will repeat
one day maybe a different way
and wouldn't that be neat
imagined as a wall of shelves
the same box lined up stretching
down the hall and round the corner
at the thought of it I'm retching

what

2.1947 : 9/1/10 : Tedious

So tedious
I can barely keep my bile down
struggle to be original
keep the lid on the style down
the only weapon
that I have when it rolls
over me
is cut it off at the knees
and pretend
it is a parody

what

2.1946 : 8/31/10 : Fastball

After a while
every year
shaves a few miles
per hour off the old
fastball
and mile by mile
it would appear
from the turnstiles
that what's left's a heart of gold
and that's all
smile for the reporter
and act like
you are happy
with the past
its glories
turn off that recorder
put down the mic
got no snappy
words to cast
just stories

what

2.1945 : 8/30/10 : Stop Pushing

Stop pushing, stop pushing
do you think that this is helping
or do you just get nervous
at the sound of anguished yelping
there's enough on my thin shoulders
though I ordered up a light yoke
but perhaps that isn't seemly
I am after all of privileged folk
Stop pushing! Stop pushing!
get your hands off me
you aren't anyone to
try to step and scoff me
Stop pushing! stop pushing...
a city song for certain
but you'll find a country boy up here
if you look behind the curtain

what

2.1944 : 8/29/10 : Sunday's Child

Sunday's child is tired
of all the crying behind the door
Sunday's child is feeling
like he's been down this road before
But Monday's child could tell him
there's no new thing 'neath the sun
And everything that's happened to him
happened to someone before
turn again to Sunday's child
Maybe he's got it this time
the eternal truth that never fades
and wrapped up in sweet rhyme
my revelation sir is that
the truth is not a monolith
and so declines to through behind
the epoch's leading myth

what

2.1943 : 8/28/10 : Forgive the Moon

Forgive the moon for not
shining bright enough
Forgive the universe
for not being made of softer stuff
Forgive you Lord for not
telling me just what to do
and forgive me especially
for forgetting you
I wrote this here
I am the author and the scribe
bowing over in secret
imagining your every jibe
I'll claim persistence
for today anyway my plume
something stored away
another decade may exhume
so forgive the moon
For being so far and so cold
forgive these tired bones
that carry me from growing old
forgive entropy
for being more persistent than me
another decade
begging for a perfect symphony

what

2.1942 : 8/27/10 : To Love You Always

It did not take a diamond ring
a promise, a hilltop, or anything
for me to know that I was
to love you always
The moment you were in my arms
as if queen fate had cast her charms
about us and to
follow us through all days
this is not a book a poem
a little players' scene
a shadow play revealed
by a lantern behind a screen
this is real life and nonetheless
each day one thing I need not guess
I will for you and you for me
a love supreme, surprising, free
a knowing that I am to love you always

what

2.1941 : 8/26/10 : The Kiss Off

If I never see you all again
it'll be too soon
this is the kiss off
let me show you the tune
you're just a pack of dumb trouble
and your welcome's stale
time to throw you out
like yesterday's mail
I used to stay up real late
thinking real heavy thoughts
sure wish I could have that time back
pin that ah hah with a thumbtack
playing sad sad music
and smoking lots
thought those cigarettes looked too cool
now I look straight back at a stone fool
once I surfed the channels
now I surf the net
you can waste your time so many ways
look back you wasted a thousand days
and when I kick it in the head
I won't miss nothing I bet
you'd get just as much from a blank screen
think I've known that since I was sixteen
If I never see you all again
it'll be too soon
this is the kiss off
let me show you the tune
You're just a pack of dumb trouble
and your welcome's stale
time to throw you out
like yesterday's mail

what

2.1940 : 8/25/10 : Safety

Just for safety
I'm going to go over the world
with a fine tooth comb
make sure I didn't miss
a whisper of your call
maybe a faint sad refrain on an old trombone
been pretty good at the safe and sorry
I guess I need a strategy
called not doing crazy stupid things again
thinking
this time it will turn out
differently for me

what

2.1939 : 8/24/10 : That Day

That day isn't going to come
is it you big none
This day is it
over and again
opportunities grown dim
If this is it
I'm not cool with that
I've got no tricks
under my hat
put it away
for another day
nothing left to say
and my beast barely at bay

what

2.1938 : 8/23/10 : Great and Small

Great and small
well, maybe not the smallest
walking tall
but you'll never be the tallest
so if I go
just to check the sell-out line
don't make a fuss anyway
nobody's buying what's mine
Who am I fooling
well surely not yours truly
maybe I'm just pining
for a little fooly cooly
but though I feel like I've been getting
crowded right up to the wall
I'll still stand and say my piece
for the great and the small

what

2.1937 : 8/22/10 : Guests

Little guests I do not like you
so you have got to go
some said to take a natural route
but I said no no no
better living through chemistry
I'll give you a taste of that
a nasty dose of chemistry
little guests you're up to bat
I guess it's been that kind of year
one damn thing after another
I'm hoping for a better one
no guests, nor any other
crazy circumstances or deviltry
come one please a little peace
normal boring sounds real great
and smash the little guests' lease

what

2.1936 : 8/21/10 : Thirsty

So thirsty
so very late
certain that the problem
will not dissipate
but in a day or three
might get a little relief
pray till then the master
does not steal in like a thief

what

2.1935 : 8/20/10 : the Hero

The hero awakes before the alarm
so gung ho for the the working
the hero jumps right out of bed
not a shadow of doubt is lurking
so efficient, so damn focused
it's like he's living every day twice
so informed, so very certain
he doesn't need a speck of advice
used to imagine I would be that
used to be sure I was one
all the little things that make a little life
I can't even get that done
The hero stays up all night
because his light burns bright not dim
I guess I'm still attached to going my own way
and really I am glad I'm not him

what

2.1934 : 8/19/10 : Dismay

Why waste your time on dismay?
But the questions persist
and the questions insist
and it's been a long stretch
I haven't felt any closer day by day
The dismay tells me
I'm doing it wrong
and though I trace it in song
there is some strong way
that I simply am not free
the anger that flashes
the depression that sinks
is a man what he thinks
or just the transient spiral
as he stirs up the ashes
I listen to the song my gut sings
troubled and roiling
avoiding or toiling
and nothing but tomorrow
the joy, the dismay
that it brings

what

2.1933 : 8/18/10 : Exhausted

I fear I have exhausted
this particular well
I know it's not exactly true
today it's the tale I've got to tell
something's got to change
there's got to be a better way
and this is not leading to that
and I'm exhausted, anyway

what

2.1932 : 8/17/10 : Ants

Like ants that work all through the night
labor to consume a poison bite
but I can no more burn that oil
another hour I cease my toil
A metaphor to make your skin crawl
become an ant to have it all
but nothing in that state possess
except to give the all-one its yes
fear we are not built for it
running on greed and guilt and shit
like that the dimwit metaphysics
run like wired up paralytics
just a daydream that I had
a different way though it seems sad
we can't reclaim our roles as giants
guess we'll leave it all to the ants

what

2.1931 : 8/16/10 : The Continuity

Is there anything left driving this
besides the continuity
am I still letting dumbass
optimistic daydreams screw with me
I don't see myself
debuting this one on the stage
I don't see much I'm
optimistic about in this new age
Up from the oh's and on
into the tweens and teens
I fear a nasty adolescence
is imprinted in this century's genes
maybe the symbol that I
cling to like a holy grail
if I prop up my sad continuity
maybe the system will not fail

what

2.1930 : 8/15/10 : Butterfly Wing

If I could travel in time
it's tempting in a way
What I could find to fix
but that's the old cliché
In almost any day
the butterfly wing
If I can't keep it all
I guess I wouldn't change anything

what

2.1929 : 8/14/10 : This is Why

This is why persist:
because to persist is human
feel it in you blood and humors
bile and albumen
there is an ending
and it brooks no dispute
what is there in the face of it
except to be resolute
this is why we ask
because the questions haunt us
so we must be restless, eager
in the face of fears that daunt us
if you are reading, writing
that end hasn't happened yet
so you must persist in this
because there is no other outlet
another day
another try at starting
persistent but with no illusions
this is wisdom I'm imparting

what

2.1928 : 8/13/10 : Thirteen

Do I believe n the song of the day?
And here it took me thirteen years to say
Yes I believe but I
don't know what it means
is it a choice I made or
something buried in my genes
God hit it over the head
with a shovel
drove it to the middle of a field
in the middle of the night
and buried it desperately
feverishly in the glare
of the headlights
and who died and made me the cops
the detective supposed to
follow the elusive trail
track it down
air it out
and dress it up like a holy grail
Who am I to
believe in anything
a nobody but still
butter fed and soft
but I have to believe in myself
nothing else is going to
keep this strange balloon aloft

what

2.1927 : 8/12/10 : Dikes

Dikes are failing
right and left
and I don't know what's next
lately I don't
have the energy
to even get perplexed
And I don't have
the wherewithal
to try and plug a hole
I'm just trying to
locate the smoke
to track down my burning coal

what

2.1926 : 8/11/10 : Stone

If I can't let my grip up
on the obdurate stone
I've got a real bad feeling I am
going to hit that wall alone
I haven't got a ritual no more
I'm in free fall
and though it's self-fulfilling
I keep thinking of that wall
seems a whole big lot of people
see it going bad to worse
seems we're all feeling that feeling
getting passed by by the hearse
and the duty that is calling
feels like running to stand still
as I watch my restless scramble
trying to gather up my will

what

2.1925 : 8/10/10 : Painkillers

Waiting for the painkillers
to kick in
waiting for the smooth ride
to begin
Good to take the edge off
it's okay
I've been good and it's been
a hard day
try to puzzle out the
riddle of pain
Does it prove god's a
delusion in my brain
is it just part of
a complete life
should I get a little more
at the tip of a knife
Well tonight I needn't
be so bold
if these old painkillers
just take hold
rock me to a deep and
silent sleep
pray to the God of pain
my whole to keep

what

2.1924 : 8/9/10 : Secret Worlds

These secret worlds that swallow me
aren't even cool
plagued by petty phantoms
the kingdom of a fool
lead to petty vices
lead to wasted hours
running from the obvious
stopping to smell the plastic flowers

Looking for a breaking point
looking for a breaking peak
that shatters every secret world
and frees my frozen tongue to speak
the answer could be anything
but nothing seems to stick
could it be that after ten long years
I'm still not sick of being sick

what

2.1923 : 8/8/10 : Mr. Genius

Mr. Genius
what a slick idea
do the same thing as before
act as if this time it'll free ya
put aside the work now
put aside regret
whatever it comes down to
it's the best you're going to get
and always there's another
until someday there is none
it goes against the principle
shall I hope this is not the one

what

2.1922 : 8/7/10 : Sad Discovery

Sad discovery
sadder still it's no surprise
days have little failures
that meet newly opened eyes
days have bigger failures
Unseen and coming down
appear and seem predictable
and here's the little frown
don't worry about tomorrow
you'd say that is the theme
can I get away with it tonight
and hope for nothing in a dream

what

2.1921 : 8/6/10 : Disconnect

Trying to repair
the disconnect
between thought and expression
if you'll allow the paid respect
feeling disconnected
want to plug back in
hope the worries and cares
don't haul another stack in
hard to change gears
especially in these days
all the adversity
smears into one haze
but time will not stop
and free moments are few
think I'll take my chance at rest
and then wait for you

what

2.1920 : 8/5/10 : Nice Work (If You Can Get It)

A joker and an artist
got an apartment in the sticks
played games and scribbled comics
I guess it beats throwing bricks
Now they've got a little empire
courtly soirées and a teevee show
making the circuit and doing good works
and still it just seems to grow
nice work if you can get it
nice story wish it were mine
nice work if you can get it
yeah I think it would suit me fine

what

put on your flaming hat

The inaccurately named "Enough" finds us at the end of Songs of Days volume 2.11, Black n' Red. Forthwith we march on to volume 2.12, Nice Work.

what

2.1919 : 8/4/10 : Enough

Enough and there will
be no ceremony
I want a million dollars
I want a fucking pony
I want my youth back
I want my health
and mastery and power
and time and wealth
enough there are you
done whining now
you look so stupid there
you stupid pining cow
enough of loving sloth
enough of crazy shouting
put on your flaming hat
let's off for a special outing
please just ignore it all
it's just me acting tough
and trying to get at least one thing right
I guess that has to be enough

what

2.1918 : 8/3/10 : As for What I Am

And as for what I am
what shall I say and
what am I to tell
Some days it seems you've
woken from a long and
dreamless magic spell
to look around
bewildered wondering
just how it came to be
yet all the history is
there and you are there
as well and me
yes what of me
I haven't said much
thinking of the likes of great men
wondering if there's any
future like that
at all waiting for my pen

what

2.1917 : 8/2/10 : How Early

How early might the rise be
how late the night
if I made a little chart today
I might start getting it right
Hard not to imagine
every terrible road
and that since nothing can stay still
something is bound to explode
I know there's gotta be a better way
but I don't know what it looks likes
When I feel like I'm on the downhill
when I feel like I'm on the third strike
I saw the looks of sad contempt
well they don't understand
we just can't ever do things halfway
here in the good old promised land

what

2.1916 : 8/1/10 : Knock Out

Knock another sucker challenger
out with one punch
hope it bored you to the core
and now I'm going to eat your lunch
I don't care about nothing
but the counter's click
running up my numbers
I'm that kind of sick
Did you stumble to your feet
for another round?
almost feel bad knocking you
over with the big sound
I'll see you swept right up
with yesterday's trash
while I'm shining up my knuckles
Cause my shit's so cash

what

2.1915 : 7/31/10 : Cheated

If you think you feel cheated
hey think about me
and if it gets repeated
well I guess it just will be

what

2.1914 : 7/30/10 : Or Get the Fuck Out

Answer now
answer now
or get the fuck out
will you deliver
or get the fuck out
You got got your gospel plow
Oh get the fuck out
but can you cross the river
bro get the fuck out
will you show me your reasons
get the fuck out
why it's all such a chore
hey get the fuck out
at the mercy of seasons
that get the fuck out
and swing like a great door
while I get the fuck out

what

2.1913 : 7/29/10 : Month

Barely aware as the
moon swells and shrinks
barely believe
a man's not what he thinks
but the thinking just so
has got something to do with it
whether he founders
or follows right through with it
thirty days
thirty one
not very scientific, son
some anniversary
that doesn't mean a thing
gone to weeds
all the ground
I try to hear the surf pound
two thousand miles away
to the month's mistress they sing

what

2.1912 : 7/28/10 : Backed Up Against

Backed up against
the ever present fence
doubting my capacity
and surely my sagacity
poor lolling vacant mind
pretend the tide is turning
and those days are already behind

what

2.1911 : 7/27/10 : Revision

Revision and remission and
the fusion of the vision
that could make the disparate parts
all sing out with the same commission
And where I once craved total peace
I've gone for plainer fare
And if you would see the land Revision
It happens I can take you there
Injunction and induction and
the restless forms of function
and the nights I lost unwinding
in the old absurd reduction
you can't pick it apart
though you might pick any point
the unraveling all ravels up again
articulate, all moving joints

what

2.1910 : 7/26/10 : Mr. Stupid

Mr. Stupid wants to be optimistic
but he's working with real bad material
Mr. Stupid gets worried by the smallest stuff
but the problems are a scale imperial
Mr. Stupid is glad that the missus
decided to keep her maiden name
because she doesn't deserve the title
because she doesn't play that stupid game
Mr. Stupid knows perfectly well
that this stupid night is a stupid dodge
a putting off of something inevitable
having to deal with the stupid messy hodgepodge
Maybe on some day not too distant
he'll get to once again feel like Mr. Smart
he can't quite give up though it's tempting
he has to pretend this is a stupid start

what

2.1909 : 7/25/10 : Prism

Refracted through the prism
I captured what I could
I lived the vital moment
I did what what I thought I should
It hurts to know it's partial
we only capture some
but I do it fully conscious
and am not deaf or dumb

what

2.1908 : 7/24/10 : Capture

I have to capture
the moment that occurs
and if it is messy
and hard to record
that is just the real
and in this moment
I truly feel
if you have to interpret
it is not so bad
the moment occurred
and I was glad

what

2.1907 : 7/23/10 : Unfair

Unfair I say and I refuse
to be ruled over and
run around by arbitrary rules
and cruel imaginings
and stupid phantom thoughts
Move along these are not
the paranoids you sought
I need a better system
but for now I'll just cheat
at a contest no one cares about
where there's nobody else to beat
and I suppose if I'm the only one
who cares about this grind of mine
it's all the more a reason
that I have to walk that line

what

2.1906 : 7/22/10 : Stellar

No thank you I refuse to sing that
no matter how true it is
or how much sense it makes
Let me tell you a lie about joy
and adventure around the corner
and a wild bet paying crazy stakes
Let me tell you a lie about change
it took exactly one day and
it stayed that way forever
there were no backslides and
there were no concessions
and it was just as easy as pulling a lever
feeling great and every day getting better
started out stratospheric
now you'd have to call it stellar
Yeah I'll sing that it couldn't hurt
any worse than another session in the cellar

what

2.1905 : 7/21/10 : Trains

The warm sound of trains
Northeast side
I can dream all I want to
but I'll never take that ride
And I can't say I feel bad
I've got obligations
that firmly preclude
riding the crazy stations
what are dreams worth
are they worth a nickel?
I don't even want to try
to cut that pickle
still something has to change
well something always does
and it pans out in its own way
just like it always does

what

2.1904 : 7/20/10 : Sufficient

What is sufficient?
I really need to know
So that I can prosper
So that I can grow
I guess things have been moving
but my God it's slow
will I figure out a damn thing
before I go
truly what's sufficient?
I must figure it out
why I'm still around here
what that fact's about
I'm trying to stay positive
trying not to pout
I fear the army's massing
and it's going to be a rout

what

2.1903 : 7/19/10 : Crash Come

If we all gave up
how much faster would the crash come
what if i just gave up
fixed my eyes on the cash and grabbed some.
maybe I'm just afraid
what if I sold out but no one was buying
back to being good but it doesn't matter
Christ what is the point of
Whatever you might think
the crash is not a delusion
though what it means nobody's sure
and its way is made straight by your confusion
if it feels inevitable
why do I have to toil toil in futile resistance
is it the off chance or some  principle?
I've still got no measure of the point
of persistence

what

2.1902 : 7/18/10 : Every Night

Find there's how it goes
the same way every night
there's how you get the
feeling nothing's going right
and if you think you'll find
the answer in a minute's work
in a few random scribbles
wait until you feel that jerk
the strand that snaps you
back into reality
And now you see it: the same old night
and every night you see
a little vision but it's
just not quite enough to deliver
that one swift kick
and so you settle for your sliver

what

2.1901 : 7/17/10 : Spirit Brother

I wonder if you saw me brother
my little shout hello
I wonder what your weather's like
could be rain or snow
sometimes it's nice not to
choose not to know so much
just that another brother's on the road
fill the world with songs, your special touch
I imagine my presence might offend you
I've been there if I might be so bold
I hope it's just my dumb mind again
hope you're better than me, not so cold
I sing a song for my spirit brother
really we are on the same side
maybe someday we will share a glass
raise a toast to the long strange ride

what

2.1900 : 7/16/10 : What if Nothing Happens

What if nothing happens for a reason
what you did before was simply wrong
or you were born unlucky out of season
born to false turns, singing the wrong song
If there's no plan, is that freeing
no more preconceptions, right
no fate to be chasing or fleeing
nothing but me in the long night
I keep looking for the middle
cliché land between my brain and heart
such a dullard's pain, yeah life's a riddle
and I mostly stall before I start
Maybe nothing's really worse or better
Always just been same old ebb and swell
Maybe I could knock off one last fetter
And hey presto all is well

what

2.1899 : 7/15/10 : Shame

It seems a shame, to be
stuck in this foolish loop
feeling hard pressed to help it
feeling mired in the soup
the little things are piling
and I it seems unequal
don't think that I can afford
to wait out for the sequel
I don't have a plot to pick up
I'm right down to scratch
I've felt cornered many times
but still this is one rough patch
but it isn't going to help me
to settle down at shame
I guess I have to try to believe
stand at least behind my name

what

2.1898 : 7/14/10 : It Still Sickens You

It still sickens you to see
each way we've failed
in the land of the free
what the news doesn't say
is almost as bad as what it does
and maybe worse some days
your prognostications were mainly true
You usually got things right
but you sure didn't hint what would happen to you
I guess it's likely you didn't know
there was always a lot of smoke with you
and you'd hinted you might up and go
I sort of hope you're someplace far
reinvented, sharp again
the better aspect, acerbic and bizarre

what

2.1897 : 7/13/10 : These Nights

These nights
have got a lot to answer for
but I can't get into it now
Failed on most points
Made it on a couple
not much excuse
for taking a last bow
better than nothing
just doesn't cut it
out there on the floor
I guess I'll be back
pray a little better
but I don't expect much anymore

what

2.1896 : 7/12/10 : All Night

Up all night
only to fail of the morning
look upon the sad
story as a warning
this shaky platform
can go up or down
for the best of everyone
I think I should conceal this frown

what

2.1895 : 7/11/10 : This Is It

How do I feel if this is it?
That is the question I chew in the pit
Is it this that makes me suffer
Full exposure, no kind of buffer
Is this it? the moment eternal
pulsing through an act of the theater internal
It is this that I'm forever returning
to see all that it it it forever churning

what

2.1894 : 7/10/10 : The Nothingth

What feels like the first
is really the nothingth
because I violated
time or something
far less interesting
than it sounds
and even tough I don't get to count t
consequence abounds
I had a terrible dream
that it was genetic
and the way I tried to
dodge the blame was just pathetic
and all I want to do
as a result today is nothing
If could just lie face down
on the floor it would be the thing

what

2.1893 : 7/9/10 : Good Story

Could I still tell
a good story
for myself
nobody else will
I suspect
but how I doubt
that could be
reality
and what I expect
is another and another
and oh God those
same old same old songs
and is it just
lack of acceptance
The misery
the fool prolongs

what

2.1892 : 7/8/10 : Bad Path

Hear feet slipping on a
bad path, going down
already blew a bunch of things
bad thoughts go to town
maybe halfway through
at best
and feeling nowhere nowhere
I see the escalator down
and I don't want to
go there
has it been this
dark before
and does it matter
anymore
I wish someone would
lead me from
this bad path

what

2.1891 : 7/7/10 : The Screw

The screw turns deeper than expected
revealing what was long suspected
The error is a broken heart
or some more esoteric broken part
the error is bad analogy
the screw was in the way I couldn't see
Which seems now rather fatal to the test
and hard to protest that I did my best
and if i saw that plan again I'd burn it
but when I see that X i have to turn it
I'm not sure what it is breaking into now
but I have to learn to live with
the screw somehow

what

2.1890 : 7/6/10 : Drowning

The dream is of drowning
and who am I fooling
deep down in my innards
ambition is pooling
and turning to something
tar black and disgusting
and all that I'm hating
and all I'm distrusting
just put that away
because it's not the night
to cease upon midnight
and fight that good fight
say maybe tomorrow
just like everyone
but then sometimes it is
by the sword, by the gun

what

2.1889 : 7/5/10 : Smokescreen

Deployment of the smokescreen
and similar techniques
Sometimes the moment merely passes
and sometimes it speaks
I'm going to try to get on track
and hope my good luck peaks
and maybe someday far ahead
I'll tell the tale to all my freaks

what

2.1888 : 7/4/10 : Fault

Ten years fly
nothing much changes
oh what a lie
all of reality rearranges
but there's still a fault
and it isn't just appearances
I'm not the sole one drowned in red ink
or banking on too many chances
Everyone believes in the fault
but never really thinks the quake will come
isn't it our way so predictable
so thoughtless and so dumb
out of words out of ideas
out of justifications
for persisting absent evidence
it's anything more than prostrations
before the dumb altar of a dead deity
something more I once thought I had
I guess I knew it was no easy ride
I really didn't think it would get this bad

what

2.1887 : 7/3/10 : The Long Goodbye

I'm not ready to let go
but there's no time for speaking
And I guess I better leave
before your poor eyes get to leaking
sometimes there's not a word to say
And yet you stare as the moments fly by
oh how you beg for just one more
day to drag out the long goodbye
sorry something's got my tongue
oh baby something's in my eye
and we both look like a mess
Well it sounds like the long goodbye
In the morning when you wake
something dragged you through grit and sand
Imagine I can barely smell
the dying perfume on my hand
think of arguments ten years old
a fight fought so long past
If I'd known then it wouldn't be settled yet
dear me I'd be aghast

what

2.1886 : 7/2/10 : Patchwork Revelation

It turns out there are five elephants
and every one is blind
And sister you will not believe
The mess that riddle leaves behind
it turns out we're all chained outside
and all the good shit's in the cave
You can stitch a patchwork revelation up
if you've got years and years to slave
what to call one who never succeeds
and still refuses to stop
is it worth it staying up
waiting for the cosmic shoe to drop
if you've got enough pieces
if you're really desperate
you'll end up with some crazy quilt
lurid and intemperate

what

2.1885 : 7/1/10 : Ultra Worm

Ultra worm the great purge
the twisting screw begets an urge
Pray to heaven for good news
'Cause lately I feel like the Devil stole my shoes
Oh great worm towering a mile
will you reset the clock, make me smile?
One more straw could bury me
What the hell Lord please stop scaring me
the small pain supplants the greater
something from long ago left a crater
a hole through the center of the doughnut
I'll be someplace else tomorrow this time no but
While I wait for the medicine to come to term
what can I do but offer thanks to the ultra worm
And get by like I always do
never quite what I imagine but I've still got you
what

2.1884 : 6/30/10 : Tomorrow

Worry not for tomorrow
is a hard lesson
And few have learned the trick
or so I'm guessing
I get it for a minute
every now and then
next thing I know I'm worrying
about tomorrow again
and I'd like it to be better
and I'd like it to be soon
but life keeps on intruding
till you all think I'm a loon
to be up again and writing
What I found written on the wall
blindly believing in tomorrow
that the sun will make his usual call
tomorrow take care of yourself
just one night you'll be fine
maybe when the next tomorrow is today
it will be the one that I make mine

what

2.1883 : 6/29/10 : Anxious

Little anxious ditty
too many anxious days
I got a bit of fear on
I got a bit of craze
a little bit of good news
not enough to pull me out
just trying to hold on
and figure what the rest's about

what

2.1882 : 6/28/10 : 4.5 Days

In four and a half days
I hope I'll start a smooth ride
after some probably not smooth moves
take a look at what's inside
maybe could have prevented it
bought a dozen years
hey it's a few thousand songs
listen then if you've got ears
I plan to rock that four point five
I plan to do it by the book
and if you've heard a few of mine
you know I plan to make it cook
So take my hand love once again
and tell me everything's all right
in just a couple thousand words' time
You will thrill how we take flight

what

2.1881 : 6/27/10 : Ideas

Out of ideas
nothing new on the stack
I guess I always find more
I guess they must grow back
how many times can you go
back to the empty well
write a song about how it's empty
eh what the hell
yeah what the hell
story of my life
or at least of tonight
and examples are rife
and the wrap up what a joke
nature of the beast
hope that I get better soon
or no worse at least

what

2.1880 : 6/26/10 : Unsure

Unsure of the
propriety
of the path I've chosen
free of notoriety
but impecunious
dare I say austere
Can't even pay to hire
some kid to call me sir
put it all together
you could say I'm doing fine
but I see so many paths
and the world's only one's mine
but if I am unsure
I am resolute
I feel so very ready
to be fired out of the chute

what

2.1879: 6/25/10 : Old Rules

Old rules: day doesn't end
until you sleep on it
Stay up all night: create a
paradox that's a perfect fit
but you can't hack that heat anymore
and the thought of worst cases
freezes you to the core
and really only God
knows just what's in store
and the old rules still make sense
the old rules still apply
and if you're looking for a visionary
I must confess that I'm your guy
So don't say anything contradictory
why not just jump on
this bandwagon is rocking now
About to get its volume pump on
Why not rock the night away
you and me baby don't need no pay
Because the big sound is here to stay
and where would we go anyway?

what

2.1878: 6/24/10 : My Big Routine

To you who has been so long suffering
unknown observer
I present my big routine
dancing tigers, elephants and fireworks
dragons and dark arts
all who see will marvel at my smarts
So much practice
I must be perfect by now
observe the wand, the cup and ball
the majesty of the sacred cow
scared of the future
my big routine is all about the past
but that is over soon
and I stand by
to reveal this grand repast

what

2.1877: 6/23/10 : Mount the Needle to the Hammer

Mount the needle to the hammer
then bring the hammer down
Mount the needle to the hammer
then bring the hammer down
Mount the needle to the hammer
then bring the hammer down
no you never heard anything
hit like this sound
wrist is the fulcrum
I will smash your hokum
Shatter every platter
better get down search for your crumb
diamond on the needle
needle on the hammer
if sick beats
 were outlawed
I'd be in the slammer
Mount the needle to the hammer
then bring the hammer down

what

2.1876 : 6/22/10 : Stay Warm

I suppose
this again
no need to tell me
I can see
I'm boring you friend
but I've got my orders
it's got its form
you've got to hustle
just to stay warm
but that's quite enough
no need to overdo
thanks for the report
now back to you

what

2.1875 : 6/21/10 : Imperfect Backup

Blame imperfect backup
for the state the wisdom's in
Caught twelve years in a loop
waiting to feel ready to begin
whoever was supposed to have my back
did not come through
but I'm still here and that is something
just between myself and you
I coulda lost a lot more
coulda got a lot more done
But somehow gets me to this point
decision made and damn your fun
Pray the new system
is a good deal more robust
for now leaves the imperfect backup
and I'll use it if I must

what

2.1874 : 6/20/10 : Vicious Viscous

Vicious viscous
time destroyer
frustrating
supreme annoyer
cut some slack
in recognition
of my blameless
false position

what

2.1873 : 6/19/10 : One Eye

One eye clean
one eye mean
excuse me sir I am
enmeshed in the machine
I built it myself
I was my own only
Santa's elf
and this is the mark
that will show
the break: clean
filled with strange delight
I won the
wrongly chosen fight
and I will call
my perseverance
might
if it might end here
for once I'll try to make
it clear
the best I've got:
the portion
of the Sphere

what

2.1872 : 6/18/10 : The Game

The game sucks! it's full of fail
It's petty ruleset is beyond the pale
are you satisfied? Are you entertained?
I tried I squinted till my eyes strained
First rule of the real game
is stay up all night
Second rule of the real game
is get into a fight
last rule of the real game
is lie down and die
Pray to God you don't let
everything in between pass you by
I'm waiting for the real game
I'm patient i know my name
five hundred forty, three thousand twelve
they must satisfy themselves
while my core plays the real game
baby nothing will ever be the same

what

2.1871 : 6/17/10 : Bent

Time seems all bent out of shape
and disarranged
stuff that went down a few days back
I already feel estranged
hey that guy isn't me
that doesn't reflect my views
in light of the developments
in context of the news
I'm already against that joker
up there in the future
he's forgotten where he came from
the cheap pathetic moocher
If I had it to do again
whoops I guess I do
I'd tell them all to get bent
and wait oh so patiently for you

what

2.1870 : 6/16/10 : Human

You want to gauge the human condition
you don't have to go out on a search mission
It's all on the line these days
And not much worth the look anyways
Only a human could be so vile
there's a higher state but we're off by a country mile
still fighting wars and messing up the atmosphere
don't buy it? Gee man do you live here
Plain as our stupid shocked faces
There is that who sees all hidden places
Into my dark heart my bleak bottom
Oh the angels are out there, you just have to spot them
And me, only human, will at last expire
And still with no idea who lit that fire

what

2.1869 : 6/15/10 : Threshold

I can't even step across that threshold
If I don't want to meet a beast that's so old
That room I've been in so damn many times
From back when quarters were packs
and calls were dimes
And with nowhere on earth else to go
just standing here I guess I know
that I crossed it before I even thought better
and will awake soon at the jerk of the fetter

what

2.1868 : 6/14/10 : Terrible Thing

You know that God could be
a terrible thing
so terribly aware
and you -
you don't know anything
keep smacking into that
window, fly
one thing you can say for God
we all eventually
get to die
I didn't say it
but it bears consideration
we may be nothing but
divine recreation
You can't deny
that it explains
a lot of terrible things
and I'm terrible for saying it
even so hope
eternal springs

what

2.1867 : 6/13/10 : Black Out

At times I day dream of a blackout
that doesn't end
if you don't think it could happen
to this society friend
you must not be paying attention
or perhaps you just prefer
not to heed the ugly options
what's the point of raising a stir
soon the batteries would run out
Soon we couldn't pump our gas
Generators getting scarce
who knows what would come to pass
I think about it when the lights go
well it always turns out right
So I suppose I'm like the rest
think nothing to turn on the light

what

2.1866 : 6/12/10 : No Markers

You become aware of time
as looped and seamless
no ends of weeks
no hours no days
no vacations
no days off for sickness
no markers, no point in displays
awake or sleeping
lucid or dreaming
conscious or unconscious
independent of all thought
or so I theorize
as my life burns before my eyes
proceeding inexorable
toward an apparent nought

what

2.1865 : 6/11/10 : Weakness

The weakness will not
leave the body
the weakness will not
leave the mind
I could tell you just
what I think of you
but I was brought up
not to be unkind
it's time to accept
a much lesser lot
but I'm starting to think
I just don't know how to
And if I accept that
where the hell does it end
what ugly idol do I
have to bow to?

what

2.1864 : 6/10/10 : Nadir

Nadir, that's the bottom, yo
bad news, probably not
but I'll pretend it's so
the thing about
the shape I'm in
is it's well beyond
motivation or sin
and however ready I felt to begin
the dice roll how they roll
attrition takes its toll
and the nadir could be lower
than I can bear to contemplate
and I just have to swallow that
because it's almost early it's so late

what

2.1863 : 6/9/10 : Came Back

I came back just to say
that all day and everyday
I'm down begging on my knees
show me the better way

I don't want to be rich
just to crawl into the black
Don't think I'm fit to save the world
just want to give a little back

You wouldn't think such mild
aspirations would be such a fancy flight
but in an abandoned and forsaken world
I guess they just might

what

2.1862 : 6/8/10 : No Rest

No rest
no true rest
I don't believe it's meaningful
don't believe it's a test
but I don't have to
bow to it
though I can't shake free
I don't have to contribute
in that tiny way I'm free

what

2.1861 : 6/7/10 : The Great Leap Forward

The great leap forward
powered by the battery
oh let me daydream for one night
oh let me dabble in self-flattery
If I really believed
If I really had faith
If Grace is truly limitless
as it is written, so sayeth
This could be the Great leap forward
ending many false trails
Starting many great tales
Free of so many false grails

what

2.1860 : 6/6/10 : Backwards

Everything is getting backwards
finding all the frayed dropped threads
a maze of splintering loose ends
because ofs mixed with insteads
try to put a marker on it
hold my hand remembering
been down that line this line the other
backwards I guess must be the thing
habits that are not making me stronger
I know what I have to do but
retracing the steps is hard
harder than staying in the rut
but I just have the day to mind
poised on the hour between one, another
help me father help me mother
help me wife, son, sister, brother

what

2.1859 : 6/5/10 : Songs

Songs, jams
Krog thank-you-ma'ams
we cooked up a few for sure
rise, fall, paracetamol
there was something in it, pure
there's no need to fret
or hedge any bet
do it right the first time
rise, take control
do a deal for your own soul
I'll sell it to you for a dime
no shtick here. pure noise
and if its clean line annoys:
remember to breathe and shut your eyes
it doesn't wrap like you suspect
it's maybe a little perfect:
a thing forgotten remembered, then: surprise

what

2.1858 : 6/4/10 : The Latest Weekend

The latest weekend
the latest song you've got to sing
post structure
post reaction
post-ism, post everything
if you la la la
if you coo coo cuchoo
You know it's out there
it's going to find you
no more ists, istics or izing
the possibilities are paralyzing
but you latest weekend kids
you've gotta move move move
you dance all thought away
nobody to approve
co-opt or package
nothing's for sale
and there's a hole
in the bottom of the pail

what

2.1857 : 6/3/10 : Your Are Here

You are here, and nowhere else
can't build experience from nothing but yourself
can't change the past, take a thing back or add
what you missed you missed and will be unsatisfied
I am here, and it's all what now what now
The joke is when I get that I'll be swallowed up in how
but something has to change, and something has to give
It's hard enough to get up, hard enough to live
This is not the change, this is not the shift
this is not the sign of the cloud about to lift
no harbinger of change, no changes in the wind
nothing at all on which to get hopes pinned
just a blurry map
an X marked you are here
And whether I get up or sit
will take its own sweet time I fear

what

2.1856 : 6/2/10 : Condition

If a name has been given
to the condition
the treatment is known
but is kept from fruition
this can't be dismissed
as a phase of contemplation
it is its own condition
a unique creation
the lists have been made
the search completed
Still day after day
the resolve is defeated
still day after day
the conviction remains
obscured though it is
by the layers of stains
I've got nothing to say
it's all been said before
one more day, one more day
staring at the black door

what

2.1855 : 6/1/10 : In the Bone

This poison this cancer this bell that tolls
Some black humor bred in the bone
these back water pest holes
hours I spent sunk in alone
how many times did I pray for release
how long how long how long
never once did the poison's flow cease
another day it seems just as strong
I'd like to promise a turn of the page
Lord knows I've done it before
Can't seem to buy into a new age
guess I better hoist my bones off the floor

what