2.1153 : 6/29/08 : Year Vow

The year vow was postponed

another brittle flaw condoned

pushed so so far past sense

Who’da guessed I’d be so dense

I used to be a rising star

I used to sing and play guitar

but I never learned just how

to hold the line and carry through

the year vow

what

2.1152 : 6/28/08 : Happy Place

Everybody’s got a posse

Everybody’s got a face

Everybody is dying

to get with me at my happy place

if you’re smelling like failure

if you’re dying onstage

spend an hour in my happy place

I carved it out of solid stone

jade and alabaster

I carved myself a hidey hole

a hedge against disaster

I’ll grow a carapace

and if that doesn’t work out

I’ll pull the roof on top of me

and hide out in my happy place

what

2.1151 : 6/27/08 : Onion

Peel that onion

I’ve got my whole life

when I get to the middle

I’ll switch to a knife

cut the heart out of it

hold it in my hand

the beating pulse of all my life

this happy brother’s band

it smells so delicious

frying in the pan

I know I will not sleep

till I’ve got this one in the can

the message of the happening

is every layer counts

and I’ll be lost among them

till I balance my accounts

what

2.1150 : 6/26/08 : Briefly

Briefly: fell behind

So much always

on my mind

vow forgotten

two days hence

no I’m lying

on the fence

no use trying to

understand

just take this item

from my hand

what

2.1149 : 6/25/08 : Segue

I gotta find a segue in here

somewhere man

This hill is very fucking steep

and I don’t even think I can

If you don’t believe in the change

If you don’t believe in what you want

If you think it’s uniformly bent

and fate is one sadistic cunt

And another hour is

fading by the same old way

and another can of tired ass gripes

how far past your welcome will you stay

And I get lost in daydreams

of striking gold or running away

as I look desperately

for my segue

what

2.1148 : 6/24/08 : Unplug Blues

Unplugged cut off

brain drip shut off

silence darkness

get up park less

unplug blues are

like a new star

hold tough one hour

set at stun power

what

2.1147 : 6/23/08 : With Your Life

Maybe there’s nothing you’re meant

to do with your life

maybe we’ve all been fooled

into twisting that knife

burn all the books

sink every ship

let every mission

and principle slip

how much worse could it be?

it might even get better

all the what should I? What should I?

turns out just a fetter

what

2.1146 : 6/22/08 : Double Down

Take your risk

lay your card

maybe feeling lucky

maybe thought real hard

double down

stake your bet

maybe it really is

as good as these odds get

double or nothing

this time around

nothing might be something

dreadful deep underground

I’ll take my chances

rather be done

pushing two steps past

the setting sun

what

2.1145 : 6/21/08 : Threads

So many threads

however many I may drop

always plenty more to pick up

and it seems no way to stop

I heard of a man who was given

his vocation at age five

it seems a strange world so uneven

hell but we’re both still alive

his thread not mine my thread not his

no common thread it seems like

And I can’t even figure if I’m

on my third or second strike

Look for the thickest or the brightest

look for the thread that’s gold?

just a story of a too late night

so what, the story’s told

what

2.1144 : 6/20/08 : Anticipate

Anticipating a desire to get out from under

and for maybe just one night

to merely sit and wonder

I’m closing every window washing every plate

I’m enthusiastic I think

it will just go great

I’m hearing alarming noises

but I’m going to let it pass

the news is bumming me out

but what will be is what will come to pass

no fixing this fiasco

might as well enjoy the ride

grim advice for any victim

but hell I’m no one’s shotgun bride

what

2.1143 : 6/19/08 : Gold

I’d like to break the hold

of the color gold

In the day in the night

it’s a curse it’s a blight

I’m hooked on this dull illusion

I’d master all with its collusion

just for color just for gold

hold off being weak and getting old

how can I chase the lie I know

why can’t I can’t I let it go

alternatives come hard and thin

nowhere to look except within

what

2.1142 : 6/18/08 : Trend

The trend cannot be sustained

despite the vow the impulse remained

When I’m facing it again looks like twelve years from

now

maybe push it down to five if I keep my vow:

Whatever, what will I be thinking then

and where will I be

pushing paper?

preaching zen?

there’s no way at all to see around that bend

So I keep swimming upstream

and bucking the trend

what

2.1141 : 6/17/08 : Ghost Life

The aggregators

the communities so called

the ghost life in the content farms

this motherfucker’s stalled

they called it an addiction

disease of modernity

pretending I’m on some last trip

it seems like an eternity

since I lived without stimulus

nor matter how the window’s closed

will bear the tag gratuitous

what

2.1140 : 6/16/08 : Camp

3,330 : 21 ?

Camp and vamp

watch me mug through another

pratfall brother

almost hard to credit

and it would bum me out if I let it

but I won’t

So just don’t

point out the obvious

just fold it up without a fuss

what

2.1139 : 6/15/08 : Rip Off

Another rip off

and I am feeling not so well

was it the sandwich

or lack of sleep

this low class jack

Can go to hell

turn it off

turn in and find out

whether some small vertigo

will make me hurl my mind out

what

2.1138 : 6/14/08 : If I’d Known

If I’d known then

what I know now

say it a thousand times

maybe will click, kapow

dark in the heart of

the same old slaughter

heaven help this son of

Adam’s daughter

In a heart of darkness

Information must be lost

transgress artificial boundaries

seems free but it extracts a cost

you do it without thinking

or you’d never go outside

this road leads to a place I’ve known

feel free to come along for the ride

what

2.1137 : 6/13/08 : Rorschach, Acid, Litmus

Stare at the inkblot

project your preconceptions blind

dropped on an acid test

refracted through the unredacted mind

The litmus test is

how hard you come, how hard you fall

I passed so many tests

but cannot find the biggest one of all

what

2.1136 : 6/12/08 : Hindenburg

Damn I’m gonna send this thing up

like my own personal Hindenburg

An unnatural disaster baby

blow up all over this dying berg

Well I don’t know if it’s what’s inside

or what’s outside that really counts

All I care is that it’s gonna fall fall fall

and there isn’t going to be no bounce

wouldn’t you like to get on board

You better jump we’ve got limited space

looking up there’s going to be a hell of a show

When I torch off the carapace

When the shell is gone and burned away

only ephemeral skeleton remains

my spirit Hindenburg will drift to space

and some new bird will rise from the flames

what

2.1135 : 6/11/08 : Cluster

Stuck like a cluster

plucked from the muster

the thing didn’t get done

they say the spots have left the sun

but the result is much the same

behind another hour in the game

should I try to write the epic

teach this poor old dog a new trick

if I could I would be doing worse

a vandal and a cutpurse

maybe not but I’m not being strong

stuck in the cluster all along

and cut the live feeds one by one

another day without the sun

what

2.1134 : 6/10/08 : Intervention

3,324 :15 ?

Chalk a foolish lapse

up to intervention

wise despite yourself

figure out your real intention

nothing to stop your

reversing it

As long as you don’t mind

being dumb as spit

I should be thanking God

I should be on my knees

I should be asking for more of the same

yes begging pretty please

It can all start now again

It can’t really get better

by definition, intervention

Fate leads you if you let her

what

2.1133 : 6/9/08 : Standup

How long will the standup guy pose last

how long will you forget me

I used to blame the world in the past

Piss and moan that you didn’t get me

I’m no comedian I’m no one’s star

As per usual I’m torn what it’s about

I’m embarrassingly over the par

And still what I’ve got, I’ve got to let out

I like to think there’s room for freaks like me

I guess as long as I don’t ask for much

I can’t imagine what would be strike three

nothing but old boneyard bill’s last touch

what

2.1132 : 6/8/08 : Fine Romance

Begin with love

so obvious

my persistent weakness

make me cuss

but the next day comes

and the one after

and every day I learn something

and every day there’s laughter

every day I try to rise

try not to throw down the glove

every day there’s chances

every day there’s love

I should be goddamned ecstatic

I should give peace a chance

And I swear this one

could be a fine romance

what

2.1131 : 6/7/08 : Endings

Endings are so foolish

but it comes like a compulsion

sweep up the deck of whining fragments

Feeling vague repulsion

Good for nothing little sapling

the rot already apparent

the structure uninspiring

the flaws grossly transparent

If I was looking for an end

to end all lies to end all wars

the world it will not go away

and those are coffin lids not doors

I’ll end it on depression

hopeless hope that’s nothing new

but it ends and that’s a start

and it does build like 2 + 2

what

2.1130 : 6/6/08 : False Positive

Saturday I thought Saturday was Friday

five minutes later it was Sunday

False positive double disappointing

and I’m hell and long gone from the one day

Keep rolling but what the fuck’s it matter

So inadequate I’d like to vomit

If I could guarantee I’d be right in the fucking bullseye

shit I’d pray we’d get hit by a comet

what

2.1129 : 6/5/08 : Wretch

I’d love to stop talking about myself

but I’m too big of a wretch not to

Another night sucked into the tubes

Wondering where the years got to

Another night fighting to fight the good fight

another round of begging please please more light

it’s easier to believe we all are doomed

but is it really better?

I know my sure love would tell me

to hang in there baby if I would let her

I shouldn’t let the bastards get me down

but it’s hard when you’re such a wretch

And maybe tomorrow I’ll surprise myself

but five before the witching hour it seems a stretch

what

2.1128 : 6/4/08 : Fragments

6 fragments

let you know when it’s done

thoughts from the teevee

are we having fun?

what

2.1127 : 6/3/08 : Dolls

Sure dolls that dance

sure playing banjo

Well that’s just silly

so who’s the man Joe

better than guns

sure better than war

I prefer the circus

but world needs bread more

Make believe won’t do it

we’re not feeding dolls

Should I grow wheat or bake bread

or keep climbing the walls

what

2.1126 : 6/2/08 : Pitiful Existence

3,316 : 7 ?

Pitiful existence

grinding’s not optional

another rough cut

before the flood, after the fall

should talk about the silver

should talk about the gold

Should talk about the girl

What the hell I’m too damn old

what

2.1125 : 6/1/08 : Every Little Thing

What getting there might mean

I don’t know but

I guess it doesn’t mean getting

every little thing, eh what?

I’ll get it on the edit

what a laugh

I’m always straight on

to the next paragraph

always putting it off

till the last damn gasp

terrified that my reach

finally exceeded my grasp

but it’s something, that’s something

isn’t it just though?

do your thing, such a shame

that we all must go

what

2.1124 : 5/31/08 : There

Without looking without noticing

without working I looked up and

found that I was there

So many possible solutions for

the equation I smashed it up

and scattered it to the air

I can’t explain the way

the thing flies around only

landing every once and a while

I took the name in vain again

but got there anyway just like

I swore I would, with a smile

what