Friday, June 23, 2017

2.1877: 6/23/10 : Mount the Needle to the Hammer

Mount the needle to the hammer
then bring the hammer down
Mount the needle to the hammer
then bring the hammer down
Mount the needle to the hammer
then bring the hammer down
no you never heard anything
hit like this sound
wrist is the fulcrum
I will smash your hokum
Shatter every platter
better get down search for your crumb
diamond on the needle
if sick beat were outlawed
I'd be in the slammer
Mount the needle to the hammer
then bring the hammer down


Thursday, June 22, 2017

2.1876 : 6/22/10 : Stay Warm

I suppose
this again
no need to tell me
I can see
I'm boring you friend
but I've got my orders
it's got its form
you've got to hustle
just to stay warm
but that's quite enough
no need to overdo
thanks for the report
now back to you


Wednesday, June 21, 2017

2.1875 : 6/21/10 : Imperfect Backup

Blame imperfect backup
for the state the wisdom's in
Caught twelve years in a loop
waiting to feel ready to begin
whoever was supposed to have my back
did not come through
but I'm still here and that is something
just between myself and you
I coulda lost a lot more
coulda got a lot more done
But somehow gets me to this point
decision made and damn your fun
Pray the new system
is a good deal more robust
for now leaves the imperfect backup
and I'll use it if I must


Tuesday, June 20, 2017

2.1874 : 6/20/10 : Vicious Viscous

Vicious viscous
time destroyer
supreme annoyer
cut some slack
in recognition
of my blameless
false position


2.1873 : 6/19/10 : One Eye

One eye clean
one eye mean
excuse me sir I am
enmeshed in the machine
I built it myself
I was my own only
Santa's elf
and this is the mark
that will show
the break: clean
filled with strange delight
I won the
wrongly chosen fight
and I will call
my perseverance
if it might end here
for once I'll try to make
it clear
the best I've got:
the portion
of the Sphere


Sunday, June 18, 2017

2.1872 : 6/18/10 : The Game

The game sucks! it's full of fail
It's petty ruleset is beyond the pale
are you satisfied? Are you entertained?
I tried I squinted till my eyes strained
First rule of the real game
is stay up all night
Second rule of the real game
is get into a fight
last rule of the real game
is lie down and die
Pray to God you don't let
everything in between pass you by
I'm waiting for the real game
I'm patient i know my name
five hundred forty, three thousand twelve
they must satisfy themselves
while my core plays the real game
baby nothing will ever be the same


2.1871 : 6/17/10 : Bent

Time seems all bent out of shape
and disarranged
stuff that went down a few days back
I already feel estranged
hey that guy isn't me
that doesn't reflect my views
in light of the developments
in context of the news
I'm already against that joker
up there in the future
he's forgotten where he came from
the cheap pathetic moocher
If I had it to do again
whoops I guess I do
I'd tell them all to get bent
and wait oh so patiently for you


Friday, June 16, 2017

2.1870 : 6/16/10 : Human

You want to gauge the human condition
you don't have to go out on a search mission
It's all on the line these days
And not much worth the look anyways
Only a human could be so vile
there's a higher state but we're off by a country mile
still fighting wars and messing up the atmosphere
don't buy it? Gee man do you live here
Plain as our stupid shocked faces
There is that who sees all hidden places
Into my dark heart my bleak bottom
Oh the angels are out there, you just have to spot them
And me, only human, will at last expire
And still with no idea who lit that fire


Thursday, June 15, 2017

2.1869 : 6/15/10 : Threshold

I can't even step across that threshold
If I don't want to meet a beast that's so old
That room I've been in so damn many times
From back when quarters were packs
and calls were dimes
And with nowhere on earth else to go
just standing here I guess I know
that I crossed it before I even thought better
and will awake soon at the jerk of the fetter


Wednesday, June 14, 2017

2.1868 : 6/14/10 : Terrible Thing

You know that God could be
a terrible thing
so terribly aware
and you -
you don't know anything
keep smacking into that
window, fly
one thing you can say for God
we all eventually
get to die
I didn't say it
but it bears consideration
we may be nothing but
divine recreation
You can't deny
that it explains
a lot of terrible things
and I'm terrible for saying it
even so hope
eternal springs


Tuesday, June 13, 2017

2.1867 : 6/13/10 : Black Out

At times I day dream of a blackout
that doesn't end
if you don't think it could happen
to this society friend
you must not be paying attention
or perhaps you just prefer
not to heed the ugly options
what's the point of raising a stir
soon the batteries would run out
Soon we couldn't pump our gas
Generators getting scarce
who knows what would come to pass
I think about it when the lights go
well it always turns out right
So I suppose I'm like the rest
think nothing to turn on the light


Monday, June 12, 2017

2.1866 : 6/12/10 : No Markers

You become aware of time
as looped and seamless
no ends of weeks
no hours no days
no vacations
no days off for sickness
no markers, no point in displays
awake or sleeping
lucid or dreaming
conscious or unconscious
independent of all thought
or so I theorize
as my life burns before my eyes
proceeding inexorable
toward an apparent nought


Sunday, June 11, 2017

2.1865 : 6/11/10 : Weakness

The weakness will not
leave the body
the weakness will not
leave the mind
I could tell you just
what I think of you
but I was brought up
not to be unkind
it's time to accept
a much lesser lot
but I'm starting to think
I just don't know how to
And if I accept that
where the hell does it end
what ugly idol do I
have to bow to?


Saturday, June 10, 2017

2.1864 : 6/10/10 : Nadir

Nadir, that's the bottom, yo
bad news, probably not
but I'll pretend it's so
the thing about
the shape I'm in
is it's well beyond
motivation or sin
and however ready I felt to begin
the dice roll how they roll
attrition takes its toll
and the nadir could be lower
than I can bear to contemplate
and I just have to swallow that
because it's almost early it's so late


Friday, June 09, 2017

2.1863 : 6/9/10 : Came Back

I came back just to say
that all day and everyday
I'm down begging on my knees
show me the better way

I don't want to be rich
just to crawl into the black
Don't think I'm fit to save the world
just want to give a little back

You wouldn't think such mild
aspirations would be such a fancy flight
but in an abandoned and forsaken world
I guess they just might


Thursday, June 08, 2017

2.1862 : 6/8/10 : No Rest

No rest
no true rest
I don't believe it's meaningful
don't believe it's a test
but I don't have to
bow to it
though I can't shake free
I don't have to contribute
in that tiny way I'm free


Wednesday, June 07, 2017

2.1861 : 6/7/10 : The Great Leap Forward

The great leap forward
powered by the battery
oh let me daydream for one night
oh let me dabble in self-flattery
If I really believed
If I really had faith
If Grace is truly limitless
as it is written, so sayeth
This could be the Great leap forward
ending many false trails
Starting many great tales
Free of so many false grails


Tuesday, June 06, 2017

2.1860 : 6/6/10 : Backwards

Everything is getting backwards
finding all the frayed dropped threads
a maze of splintering loose ends
because ofs mixed with insteads
try to put a marker on it
hold my hand remembering
been down that line this line the other
backwards I guess must be the thing
habits that are not making me stronger
I know what I have to do but
retracing the steps is hard
harder than staying in the rut
but I just have the day to mind
poised on the hour between one, another
help me father help me mother
help me wife, son, sister, brother


Monday, June 05, 2017

2.1859 : 6/5/10 : Songs

Songs, jams
Krog thank-you-ma'ams
we cooked up a few for sure
rise, fall, paracetamol
there was something in it, pure
there's no need to fret
or hedge any bet
do it right the first time
rise, take control
do a deal for your own soul
I'll sell it to you for a dime
no shtick here. pure noise
and if its clean line annoys:
remember to breathe and shut your eyes
it doesn't wrap like you suspect
it's maybe a little perfect:
a thing forgotten remembered, then: surprise


Sunday, June 04, 2017

2.1858 : 6/4/10 : The Latest Weekend

The latest weekend
the latest song you've got to sing
post structure
post reaction
post-ism, post everything
if you la la la
if you coo coo cuchoo
You know it's out there
it's going to find you
no more ists, istics or izing
the possibilities are paralyzing
but you latest weekend kids
you've gotta move move move
you dance all thought away
nobody to approve
co-opt or package
nothing's for sale
and there's a hole
in the bottom of the pail


Saturday, June 03, 2017

2.1857 : 6/3/10 : Your Are Here

You are here, and nowhere else
can't build experience from nothing but yourself
can't change the past, take a thing back or add
what you missed you missed and will be unsatisfied
I am here, and it's all what now what now
The joke is when I get that I'll be swallowed up in how
but something has to change, and something has to give
It's hard enough to get up, hard enough to live
This is not the change, this is not the shift
this is not the sign of the cloud about to lift
no harbinger of change, no changes in the wind
nothing at all on which to get hopes pinned
just a blurry map
an X marked you are here
And whether I get up or sit
will take its own sweet time I fear


Friday, June 02, 2017

2.1856 : 6/2/10 : Condition

If a name has been given
to the condition
the treatment is known
but is kept from fruition
this can't be dismissed
as a phase of contemplation
it is its own condition
a unique creation
the lists have been made
the search completed
Still day after day
the resolve is defeated
still day after day
the conviction remains
obscured though it is
by the layers of stains
I've got nothing to say
it's all been said before
one more day, one more day
staring at the black door


Thursday, June 01, 2017

2.1855 : 6/1/10 : In the Bone

This poison this cancer this bell that tolls
Some black humor bred in the bone
these back water pest holes
hours I spent sunk in alone
how many times did I pray for release
how long how long how long
never once did the poison's flow cease
another day it seems just as strong
I'd like to promise a turn of the page
Lord knows I've done it before
Can't seem to buy into a new age
guess I better hoist my bones off the floor


Wednesday, May 31, 2017

2.1854 : 5/31/10 : Same Dream

Every day fail to balance on the beam
every night every night the same dream
or maybe only similar
It's all sure as hell familiar
Whatever I say tomorrow it won't mean a thing
No matter how long I push the pendulum will swing
And the same dream or similar harasses me
Every night I have to fight to let sleep happen to me
Every night I fight the same stupid little battle
Every day I sigh and climb back up into the saddle
Will this storm stop for a while now or just get worse
Is there any good damn reason for this curse
do I have the right to piss and moan just a little
you seem to have time
to listen to me rhyme
while you saw that fiddle


Tuesday, May 30, 2017

2.1853 : 5/30/10 : Crazy

We keep doing what we're doing
expecting a different result
someone said that that was crazy
But I say it's not our fault
Because when you run out of ideas
what else are you going to do
it doesn't matter if you know it's crazy
You can't stand to do nothing so you have to
do it all again and just feel crazy
do it until every reason's hazy
the sides the speeches the fighters and teachers
the acts and manifestos oh we're crazy creatures
way too late I think I see a different way
some other organization, no icons no leaders
who do I think I am just another crazy
how many have tried unseen unheeded
You can't change human nature
Which is crazy so we're doomed
concluded so went away and the
same old same old resumed


2.1852 : 5/29/10 : Waste

Here it goes again
and it's going to waste
miss another chance
to declare a place
as the landing strip
or the turning point
or the launch pad
or the cursed joint
So set by the way
tapping out and down
no chance of wrestling the future
to the fucking ground
hang that fucker up
Say you've seen his game
Say it makes no never
say it's all the same


Sunday, May 28, 2017

2.1851 : 5/28/10 : Dark Path

The dark path again
the hard math again
I could say my head was spinning
but really nothing's moving
Unforeseen blank again
Back in the tank again
New fears still beginning
nothing here worth proving
going up then down
shake my cup in town
could you spare half a penny
brother are you getting any
lost the thread it's gone
drag this bed along
that I've left unmade
lie in dirt instead


2.1850 : 5/27/10 : Brief

State your case and make it brief
You'll not be asked again
the judge will render unto you
a reason for how when
You thought you were on the edge
of something like success
bad luck and more bad luck came
another crazy mess
there do you feel better now
with reason in your hand
no better off no real response
but leave the witness stand
the line is stretching out the door
they all want to state
their cases to the authority
we're sure you can relate


Friday, May 26, 2017

2.1849 : 5/26/10 : No Marker

No marker this time
no true count
no way to know or guess
the actual amount
is that a gimmick
some kind of trick
Regardless I'm just hoping
this time it will stick
So many so many
So how to believe
that I might still have
a surprise up my sleeve
one day and another
burn each bridge so carefully
leaving back no line or marker
what remains is only me


Thursday, May 25, 2017

2.1848 : 5/25/10 : Throwaways

Having learned not one thing
from all the other throwaways
I hang the shame I'll wince at
in a couple thousand days


Wednesday, May 24, 2017

2.1847 : 5/24/10 : Power Trip

No defeat
I want a rising beat
and something to get
So many people on their feet
a tongue's slip
is it really just a power trip
Say you want to liberate
or just to have them in your grip
So hard to believe
with so many dead dreams to grieve
like it's going to fall together
when all the flesh starts to heave
hey I just want a little show
nowhere special, a dozen go
no power trip, talk right
over me after all what do I know


Tuesday, May 23, 2017

2.1846 : 5/23/10 : Bow

Tie every loose end
in a neat neat bow
throw the bottle far enough
hope you catch the undertow
I want every ending
to be happy, not sad
every little thing good
Why not? nothing bad
we get tons of realism
in this life
mountains of cold pragmatism
buying strife
I'll take a happy ending
when I'm feeling low
pack all up neatly and
deliver with a bow


Monday, May 22, 2017

2.1845 : 5/22/10 : Evidence

Cover up the evidence
of continued wasting of life
throw up a front, spare no expense
poke it and dig around with the knife
so full of venom
so full of rage
so empty of the wherewithal to fill another page
tick on like an old spring clock
I don't know what the hell is winding me
mulling over, taking stock
you're taking your damn good time finding me
one in a million means so little down here
means lost among the thousands
and one thing's clear
you've got to cover up the evidence
try to look important
it will mean nothing fifty years hence
So let's not talk about the elephant
standing by in this small room
also don't mention it's a tomb


Sunday, May 21, 2017

2.1844 : 5/21/10 : Days

What is the story
of all these days that get away
doing something wrong I'm sure
but do not know what else to say
the story of the moment
to the moment is compelling
but when I try to justify
it just feels like I'm selling
and really who is buying it
anyone besides me?
selling a number
a title, some fantasy
the lone creator
the genius in his toil
praying something worthwhile
sprouts out of this base soil


Saturday, May 20, 2017

2.1843 : 5/20/10 : Shameful

Too many reminders
of shameful little ditties
Why blazoned in capitals
the stupids and the pretties
any story of what it's for
crashes on the evidence
of random words and lines
that do not make a lick of sense


Friday, May 19, 2017

2.1842 : 5/19/10 : Status

Everybody's checking the status
It seems to be okay
knock on wood for now
check a little deeper another day
not what I expected no
Guess that it never is
always these reminders
Not my time, all His
Thank you for the status check in
thanks for asking after
hope in not too much time
I'll refer to it all with laughter


Thursday, May 18, 2017

2.1841 : 5/18/10 : Suspend

Tonight I will not
suspend my disbelief
that it matters what
I pull out of the teeth
of grief
or the eternal thief
Tonight I'll take
Whatever I can get
and if you're the type
to place a bet
I'd caution you to let
your better judgement favor any debt


Wednesday, May 17, 2017

2.1840 : 5/17/10 : Recursion

Feel the pull of recursion again
its the nature of the universe
of life itself my friend
iterate, reiterate to no clear end
and speaking of endings, maybe
that's missing the whole point
the process is the whole show
no terminus or joint
Does that mean I'm fine?
Does that mean I'm a success
does that mean there's a silver lining
in this God-forsaken mess
Go over it and over it
ten years, ten more
soon a strange recursion of a young man's
knocking on my door


Tuesday, May 16, 2017

2.1839 : 5/16/10 : Monster of Impatience

I want to name this monster
of impatience for you so bad
my finest little friend
Because it will be too long
until you can finally
I look for answers
in books and prayer
these days I'd try to
seek it anywhere
and I swear I will
get better
at making the monster tame
and until then I can only
remind you
it doesn't really
share my name


Monday, May 15, 2017

2.1838 : 5/15/10 : Cries

Everyone cries
even tough guys like me
all those billions and billions of tears
filled up the great salt sea
the world is so sad
and there's so little we can do
and asking why won't get you anywhere
that's something I know is true
Everyone cries
kings and presidents
Queens and parliaments
it makes no matter
they cry over movies
they cry over our graves
cry for the ones that nothing saves
over pages tears spatter
I cry when I need to
I cry when I must
but I often can't when I want to
I guess something to do with trust


Sunday, May 14, 2017

2.1837 : 5/14/10 : Ghosts

I feel the ghosts of graves and guns
ghost of old pains
through my channels it runs
I said please make it easier
So you make it harder
honestly do you think
this ordeal's making me smarter
Because I don't feel smarter
I feel dumb as a spike
that got pounded on the wrong end
a good fifty strikes
and these ghosts swirling round
they aren't telling me squat
least of all who the hell's
bad luck I caught


Saturday, May 13, 2017

2.1836 : 5/13/10 : Bright Side

Does your
two headed penny
have a bright side, bright side
heads you win, heads you win
which is my side?
reviewing past performance
I may not have been so great
at looking for the bright side
what would you say
has made me strong?
What would you say has made me well?
What makes me sick and weak and sad?
What makes this sour dust taste
What makes a prison cell
What makes us feel that we've been had?
Does your
two headed penny
have a bright side, bright side
heads you win, heads you win
which is my side?


Friday, May 12, 2017

2.1835 : 5/12/10 : A Word

Could I have a word with you
you Lord
if that's the word
for something that seems
only to wield silence
or a sword
the thing is
I can't make this
math work out
and this cheap postcard
I got sent seems
to smirk, pout,
sneer, disappear
Sorry I guess I can't remember
what the word was
and the answer always
seems to be just because
so it doesn't seem much worth it
to remember or say


Thursday, May 11, 2017

2.1834 : 5/11/10 : Break Out

Break out today though some
bars I'll carry with me
some new some old I'm
hoping for renewing
of some old dreams dry dreams
stale and choked with dust
that nasty jolt we hit hurt
but it shook off some rust
no doubt there will be time
For the bright talk to lose its shine
but I'm used to the ups and downs
I can tell which voice is mine
and it's good enough now
to see the bright side in beating this bout
and getting up and getting home
and breaking out


Wednesday, May 10, 2017

2.1833 : 5/10/10 : Nomad Middle

In this nomad middle, a field
of dreams
some interesting some so dull
though sent in on the same beams
the nomad is me a solo traveler
of arid seas
and the middle well
this middle here
is the forest I can't see for the


Tuesday, May 09, 2017

2.1832 : 5/9/10 : If This is What it Takes

If this is what it takes
to slow me down enforce a break
I guess I'm learning it
If the medium's the message
and the message is to stop
I guess I'm learning it
Well I didn't think I
would be quite so dense
I would wait so long
to get off the fence
but if this is what it takes
to lose a little control
I guess I needed that
Oh I recall so many
early warning calls
I wish I'd heeded that


Monday, May 08, 2017

2.1831 : 5/8/10 : I Would Say

I would say
this day has not
ended for me yet
and I did not
suspect even a
fraction of what I'd get
I will take my
free pass on this
small matter
not enough
to pain or
make my thoughts scatter
it's an experience
I can say that much for sure
not what I'd ask for
but you can't say it's not pure


Sunday, May 07, 2017

2.1830 : 5/7/10 : Phone

Bitch shut off your phone - bitch shut off your phone - bitch shut off your phone: bitch please shut off your phone - just turn the damn thing off if you want to be left alone - just turn off your damn phone - bitch turn off your damn phone
If you look you'll find a little button on the top
Just hold it down and all those calls you're hating on will stop
And put it in your purse now that wasn't hard you see
and also on the plus side it will save your battery
Bitch shut off your phone - bitch shut off your phone - bitch shut off your phone: bitch please shut off your phone - just turn the damn thing off if you want to be left alone - just turn off your damn phone - bitch turn off your damn phone
hawking products in your videos makes you a whore
they may call it new burlesque, it's grinding on the floor
nothing at all there someone didn't do before
more hype more ads more clothing bads I thought there would be more
Bitch shut off your phone - bitch shut off your phone - bitch shut off your phone: bitch please shut off your phone - just turn the damn thing off if you want to be left alone - just turn off your damn phone - bitch turn off your damn phone
there's a button on the top that'll make it stop, turn off your goddamn phone
there's a button on the top that'll make it stop, turn off your goddamn phone



Saturday, May 06, 2017

2.1829 : 5/6/10 : The Hole

Not feeling like suppressing
all the hate tonight
It's flowing fully freely
and I feel great tonight
prone to no vices
Yeah day zero again
I'm hammering on the gates
motherfucker let me in
Could I feel smaller
Sir, no, I could not
While you pull your force majeure
on one other's battle fought
to you sir is my deepest bow
my forehead hits the floor
and crashes right down through it
sorry I can't offer more
but the hate will keep me occupied
my hands from idle work
my eyes from seeking out offense
until I feel the jerk


Friday, May 05, 2017

2.1828 : 5/5/10 : Could Be the Start

This could be the start
of something good or bad
end up feeling like a King
or feeling I've been had
trying to take a step up and another
trying to take my own advice
just trying to find something that's good enough
I'd want to do it twice
It looks so much like the old
hard to convince myself it's new
it could really be the start
if I believed that was true
trying to take a step up and another
trying to take my own advice
just trying to find something that's good enough
I'd want to do it twice
I wrote the rest already
in a vision or a dream
though it seemed so much better there
such things are never as they seem
trying to take a step up and another
could be the start up to the top
just trying to find something that's good enough
that I never want it to stop


Thursday, May 04, 2017

2.1827 : 5/4/10 : Slower

Harder time
is always slower time
I can almost appreciate
still the work chime
goes off constantly
and I am dragging see
as I try try try
to go about it patiently
couldn't be sweet, easy
and go slow too
another long turn around
another day is through
gone past in slower speed
stuffing in so much need
and I am the bullet now
only one voice I heed


Wednesday, May 03, 2017

2.1826 : 5/3/10 : Situation

I can't retreat I cannot stand
I can only sit here with a clenched hand
this situation what a mess
I should stop watching the news
and reading all these clever people
with their clever views
I try to do right I try to be just
but all around me all I hear is
must must must
they tell me what's necessary
it just doesn't seem right
and the situations been
keeping me up too many nights
I can turn off the box
I can stop the Reed
I wont' change anything anyway
maybe I get my chance to need
it doesn't quite satisfy
and it's sure no vacation
isn't that just like
the situation


Tuesday, May 02, 2017

2.1825 : 5/2/10 : Specifics

I'm ready to give up
on the specifics
I'm dreaming oh God
of the Pacific
That chance is gone
and it might be so long
before the creed
of possibility
sings me the next song
I should be happy
What the hell, I am
my daily quotient
of come-ons and spam
I'm not going to complain
or whine, or cry
I'll just stand up
and weep
'cause I'm a stand-up


Monday, May 01, 2017

2.1824 : 5/1/10 : The Rats

In anticipation
of a quick collapse
stockpiling procedures
while the gentry claps
I suspect the system
can't adapt near fast enough
and you'll see the rats' abandonment
when it gets rough
some say we've got
comeuppance coming
doing the black tails
when we should be slumming
Well I just shrug my shoulders
and I shake my head
we've got our sins and privileges
but still we all wind up dead


Sunday, April 30, 2017

2.1823 : 4/30/10 : What Is/Maybe So

What is life?
It's a chemical reaction
maybe so
it's a series of retractions
maybe so
What is why?
it's a meaningless oration
maybe so
a vapid exclamation
maybe so
What is love?
it's a series of decisions
maybe so
it's a lifetime of revisions
maybe so
maybe so
or maybe not


Saturday, April 29, 2017

2.1822 : 4/29/10 : Aspire

Do I aspire to this grim profession
Scrivener, scribbler
might make an impression
on some callow youth
inspire in them an outburst
The balance in the bankbook though
traditionally thus cursed
remembrance of
you peek a boo past
like a head in a vice
with your foot in a cast
in ten more years
they might call it art
while I watch a little more
of the world fall apart


Friday, April 28, 2017

2.1821 : 4/28/10 : Later

Later man I wished
I learned and then I fished
Ignorant of depth
or the ways, or the tides
I tried so hard to do it
without choosing sides
and when the stranger advised me
to switch up for one last cast
I did as I was told
but I could think of nothing but the past


Thursday, April 27, 2017

2.1820 : 4/27/10 : Cheat

Hell yeah I'll cheat
Why not? You do
with your heads I win, tails I lose
crackerjack voodoo
considering the
shape that I'm in
You can take the rules and
shove them in your exit bin
like any of it matters
five years or ten
or the reason some dim night
I chose to start up again
While the true quill always
comes and goes
You push me one inch more
I swear we'll come to blows


Wednesday, April 26, 2017

2.1819 : 4/26/10 : Any More

What exactly are you looking for?
I don't really know why
I ask that any more
it's obvious not a thing makes sense
and expecting reasons
makes me sound so dense
I don't eve have a right to complain
still it's real trouble
and real pain
and if I stop looking for
things to signify
I guess I'll just push on
until the day I die


Tuesday, April 25, 2017

2.1818 : 4/25/10 : The Corpse

No rush to destroy
the house though it is dead
and flesh is falling off the bone
while we go on living in the head
the eyes are windows now
where lips were is a gate
no tongue lies ready
this is the corpse's grim estate
I pray that it goes slow enough
I pray we can hold on
though its fate waits
for all of us
and finds us all no matter how far gone
the corpse is the reminder
the corpse is the retreat
this gross estate we fester in
the fate of all dead meat


Monday, April 24, 2017

2.1817 : 4/24/10 : The Question (Ten Years On)

Ten years on
the question comes
long after the answer is forgotten and gone
the bottle broken
the ammunition damp
the vestiges gone off
on some great Cosmic tramp
pretend that it's a riddle
and not just some damn mess
a pig's still a pig
If you put it in a dress
Still it's neat to have the question
something tough to chew
while I wait and wait
and wait
to be told what to do


Sunday, April 23, 2017

2.1816 : 4/23/10 : Nice Planet

Well it seems like a nice planet
still despite all the stuff
these days
that temperature thing
all the concrete everywhere
so many of us
and the theory that crime pays
fast as we're cooking
it goes so slowly
we'll all be dead
and hardly even see
our crazy extent
I try to stay positive
despite it all imagine
some solution state
all of us
under the big tent


Saturday, April 22, 2017

2.1815 : 4/22/10 : Expecting Death

Expecting death
is not pessimism
and in that simple horror tale
is the root of the death of -ism
and yet to dwell on it
is to poison what is sweet
in life and little as there is
it's a shame to waste the tender meat
Expecting ends
ages, civilizations
deaths of economies
and media and occupations
the only solution
that I've ever found
is to be here now
feet on ordinary ground


Friday, April 21, 2017

2.1814 : 4/21/10 : Box

Maybe the box has gotten too small
no more experience to mine at all
the worm turns and chomps its tale
I try to look up and out but I fail
I tell myself not to get angry but I do
I'd happily blame the whole thing on you
bitter protests from inside the box so small and plain
So I'm shallow and a whiner but it's a real pain
And it's catch 22 to be in it
I want to escape but can't find the resources to begin it
nothing to write about nothing to sing
nothing to build on don't have anything
that's so untrue but the box steals my breath
and it's so hard in here not to dwell on death


Thursday, April 20, 2017

2.1813 : 4/20/10 : Needle

There's only one needle: it's a diamond tip
There's only one vein: rests in a vinyl grip
heard about your junkies
and the hypoderm
there's no spot in my lexicon
for such a term
There's only one needle: it's a diamond tip
There's only one vein: rests in a vinyl grip
drop it every hour, always throwing
the tech is obsolete but it just keeps going
There's only one needle: it's a diamond tip
There's only one vein: rests in a vinyl grip
a vinyl valley, an exquisite groove
been around so long there's nothing left to prove
Just the only needle, the diamond tip
resting so delicious in its vinyl grip


Wednesday, April 19, 2017

2.1812 : 4/19/10 : Fried Egg Chili Chutney Sammie

Fried egg chili chutney sammie
and if you get the reference
hey you're my man, see
thanks for the memories
all you who remember
Some April, some May
Some July some December
there's a perfectly reasonable
explanation for everything
and if I can just recall
well then how I'll sing
I feel satisfied
I'll suffer later
take a nap then
and hell with the haters
and leave it like that
just let me take one last square
from my silly hat


Tuesday, April 18, 2017

2.1811 : 4/18/10 : Wondering

If I can't figure out the math
and I know I can't
if you're the great space station
to my tiny little ant
then if I could just ask for
one thing today
would you please make
all of this wondering go away
I don't believe in it at all
I know it's all wasted thought
I better just feel lucky
pray to keep what I've got
between the rising sun in space
and the great sea thundering
I don't see why I can't just
give up all this wondering
tell me it's all for a reason
tell me you've got a plan
Why bother trying to grasp
the greatest greater than


Monday, April 17, 2017

2.1810 : 4/17/10 : Doing Right

Doing right
but I still don't
feel like I'm winning
not enough
this rope I'm hanging on
is thinning
get through this
get through that
just more comes down
and I guess
it's time to give up
on this ghost town


Sunday, April 16, 2017

2.1809 : 4/16/10 : Situation

Asked to choose fame and fortune
or the world's salvation
well nobody believe's that's possible
it's a bad situation
and the whole ball of wax is just fantasy time
my usual grandiose dreams
I've got my little row to hoe
while I pick over my hopeless schemes
how many years how many years gone past
since I thought I saw I though I saw the wave
and just when I decide to give it all away
I look around and can't find one thing to save
the world doesn't want it, people don't want it
and I don't have it so really what the hell?
It's a strange world coming and I'm in it up to here
just another dupe with no principles to sell


Saturday, April 15, 2017

2.1808 : 4/15/10 : Enough Again

Maybe tomorrow
tomorrow and tomorrow and
but today I've had
enough again
and more to come
and no master plan
maybe no plan at all
no original fall
only luck no direction
So I think in my dejection
maybe tomorrow
the big big deal
the more than enough for once
the advent of Is Real


Friday, April 14, 2017

2.1807 : 4/14/10 : For Old TImes' Sake

For old times' sake
I'll fly old colors
nothing of strength
nothing of valor
could be harder
but that's no comfort
gotta be strong soon
and defend the old fort


Thursday, April 13, 2017

2.1806 : 4/13/10 : Pull

Something flapping madly in the skull
something tapping in the chest
and a furious pull
No vessel to delivery this
angry rant
no cleric to receive this
disappointed chant
But if I don't spill it out
pull the plug somehow I'll spout
it scalding on the wrong wrong
How I wish there were
a handy devilish cur
here to get my curse on
I get nothing but
22 grey lines on a page
and seven minutes while I
Sit and feel my body age
and can't even use up what I've got
nothing to do but pull out and leave it to rot


Wednesday, April 12, 2017

2.1805 : 4/12/10 : You Call This a Mission

Maybe I was unclear
I wasn't on a hunt for more bad luck
I wasn't looking for another chain to bolt on
If fact I was hoping to get unstuck
You call this a mission?
Is this your sense of humor
I don't think I like you so much anymore
not sure I want to be your consumer
You call this a mission
you call this a mission
I'd be better off burning trees
and vegetating on the television
you call this a mission
well I've got a new deal
stay out of my damn way
what you won't give I'll steal


Tuesday, April 11, 2017

2.1804 : 4/11/10 : Middle

What in the world to call a story
that begins and begins
always waiting for a middle
for a mission for my sins
I trust the end to care for itself
strange as that might seem
but this restless churning of beginning
cracks me like a fever dream
and a the moment of decision
once again I jumped the gun
but I will not agonize
it could occur to anyone


Monday, April 10, 2017

2.1803 : 4/10/10 : Gut

Hey the next remark
comes down to the gut
are you confused?
focus: eh, what?
cultivate a crop
harvest at the right time
if you want it, age it:
this time's dime
not this year, perhaps
the next
if you are confused, perplexed
look back
and remember
the next chance
will be NEXT


Sunday, April 09, 2017

2.1802 : 4/9/10 : Dumb

Feeling so dumb as moronic vice
tries to suck me in
if I've paid that piper twice
I've paid him ten
resistance so half hearted
it will be a miracle
If I net one step past the place I started
the zero empirical
tired of feeling like there's two
of me stuffed in here
and though I shouldn't rely on you
it makes my path less clear
to be up late here on my own
to wrestle with ideas
whose dark sides seem to have daily grown
and never ever free us


Saturday, April 08, 2017

2.1801 : 4/8/10 : Offense

Taking offense too easily
by people suffering far more than fools like me
and then again is it so hard just not to be vile
but I'm sick, my meter's off, I've lost my style
a good offense, a big stick, better a gun
I feel it getting personal, but you're not anyone
to me, a stranger
sad facts thin, strung on a long line
and me with bigger fish to fry, humping up this incline
So leave it unresolved and sitting on the fence
and if I never glance your way again
please do not take offense


Friday, April 07, 2017

2.1800 : 4/7/10 : No Credit

No credit for you
this is all me
no reflection on me
I'm not strong or mighty
I guess I'll follow through
on the promise so dull
and pray on my way down
something can breach our hull
but if it sinks or rises
no credit for you
you float way up there uninvolved
just like you always do


Thursday, April 06, 2017

2.1799 : 4/6/10 : Decision Double Standard

You've got a nice double standard
when it comes to decisions
Well it's not just decisions
I suppose
I fail it means everything
succeed it means nothing
well I'm well acquainted
with these emperor's clothes
but failing doesn't fix it
it still isn't worth it
such a nice system
tails I lose
and it all ends the same
nobody wins the game
So why in the hell
do you force me to choose?


Wednesday, April 05, 2017

2.1798 : 4/5/10 : No Entrance

Less concerned with getting out
than finding some way in
whatever once seemed clear a while
is drowned out by the din
the noise of pain the clamor
of what shouldn't matter
what people I don't care about
will think about the dust I scatter
It isn't starting now
I feel it in my very bones
searching for something
that nobody sees and no one owns
wanting to be unique
look where it's got me so far
it isn't nothing but
by God it is a low bar


Tuesday, April 04, 2017

2.1797 : 4/4/10 : Up

Up indeed and try to cast
that anxious searching feeling off
ignore the mass of tentacles and eyes
that lingers with a polite cough
there is yours and here is mine
and truly never shall the two meet
I only hope we can be cordial
when passing on a dark street
they say it's all going underwater
they say the desert is on the rise
they say the comet could hit any time
sneak around Jupiter, catch us by surprise
they say the radicals will have a nuke soon
they're gonna blow our asses up
and you say nothing, pointedly eyeing
my grim half finished cup


Monday, April 03, 2017

2.1796 : 4/3/10 : Little Kite

Hey flimsy little kite
made of cheap flimsy stuff
still flies with all its might
hangs tight on winds so rough
you will not last too long
you will get smashed apart
if you were only strong
made with a stout heart
hey little kite up there
don't you know you will crash
don't get used to the air
so soon you'll just be trash
little kite cannot hear
flies up there anyway
and though its end is really near
acts like it's way up there to stay


Sunday, April 02, 2017

2.1795 : 4/2/10 : Good Friday

Radical this and radial that
everyone thinks he as a real great cat
Every Good Friday I say my piece
and pray vainly for my fortunes to increase
ugly pictures of ugly things
that point in the night where the truth stings
maybe it was all crazy just mistakes
maybe all a waste but them's the breaks
but I'll pass these days
and more will come
and it'll make a little sense
not all
but some


Saturday, April 01, 2017

2.1794 : 4/1/10 : 3 Ice Cubes

3 ice cubes can
define a moment
broken promises
a glorious foment
the most important time
I describe the final rhyme


Friday, March 31, 2017

2.1793 : 3/31/10 : Chaos

Chaos reigns in the small hours
chaos reigns in the ivory towers
I dream of an idea that transcends
in a crazy universe where nothing ends
make your movie make your novel
it won't mean much in this hovel
I dream of a day free of obligation
but I don't pretend, I've learned my station
whatever has been sent in the past
tomorrow's open, empty, ho, avast
I'll translate it when the moment comes
I won't remember the context or the sums
that add up to a final reckoning
and I hear the wild calling beckoning


Thursday, March 30, 2017

2.1792 : 3/30/10 : No More

No more
I'm not
the one
it is not
it will not
I've had
I've had
it tough
it isn't
but consider
my state


Wednesday, March 29, 2017

2.1791 : 3/29/10 : Apropos

It would seem to be apropos
that despite knowing exactly where to go
I keep pointing my nose at
where not to
as if by some compulsion
I've got to


Tuesday, March 28, 2017

2.1790 : 3/28/10 : Affect/Effect

No affect: no effect
one last time
this defect
one last time listen to me
if it wasn't so typical
it might be funny
I get a little bit
of my affect back
I need a little bit
of weight off my pack
I can't sustain one more
failed pass
guess I better pray hard
for you to save my ass


Monday, March 27, 2017

2.1789 : 3/27/10 : Vile World

Excuse my belief
in this vile world
it is unjustified
beyond reason
I try as I might
for what it's worth
to fix what I can
in its season
I know you're frustrated
I know how it looks
and I can't show you
and you can't see
I've nothing to say
no excuses here
I do as I must
so secretly


Sunday, March 26, 2017

2.1788 : 3/26/10 : The Path

Irritated by the path I'm set on
dreaming of some other train to get on
knowing it's a dream and a sham
How long can I keep falling for my own scam
I just want to feel it in my bones
And make it happen but I don't have the stones
Am I willing to scratch and beg?
to get the goose to lay a golden egg
If I tried to map the path out would I get it
Maybe it all happened and I chose to forget it


2.1787 : 3/25/10 : End of Lent

The end of lent
end of the fast
I didn't really stick to
whatever: that moment passed
and here comes another
early as it can be
a week to holy Thursday
The final commandment:
Thou shalt be
I haven't got a sum up point
a final online slide
I'm making it up as I go along
I'm taking the dividend
out of my hide
So easy to spin out the verse
so so hard to claim it
I've got another
habit to attend
then I'll come back and
tame it


Friday, March 24, 2017

2.1786 : 3/24/10 : Early Start

Let's get an early early start
on this new deal
All you've got to have is heart
all you have to do is feel
In the middle of the night
I will be peaceful, gone
And while I'm still out of sight
you will hear my song
singing la la la la
la la la
la la la la la
One morning can't make it
not a month and a week
if you're really going to break it
at its terrible peak
It will be a game of ages
of years and years
hope I store up enough pages
for when it crashes 'round my ears


Thursday, March 23, 2017

2.1785 : 3/23/10 : Close Out

Close out to get this
messed up funk
now get it if
you dig this junk
tomorrow allow
stock will change
will turn completely
can't be this one
can't be that
can't seem to find
a well fitting hat
still the picture I saw
was clear as a bell
I've got a heavy damn bag
of flowers to smell


Wednesday, March 22, 2017

2.1784 : 3/22/10 : Windmills

Quixote wasn't fighting the power
or speaking truth to the man
fighting inanimate objects
Is not such an impressive plan
Maybe I will learn this time
to really set down the lance
to really stop tilting the windmills
to really join the real dance


Tuesday, March 21, 2017

2.1783 : 3/21/10 : Hit It

The target's small so is the ball
I can't seem to win my baby
anything at all
I can't hit it, hit it
Why won't I quit it?
Screw the ball and give me a bat
and I will hit that
that carnie's staring at me
with his big ass bear
I think I'd like to set fire to his greased up hair
I can't hit it, hit it
why wont' I quit it?
screw the ball and give me a bat
and I will hit that


Monday, March 20, 2017

2.1782 : 3/20/10 : Stupid Windmills

Stupid windmills just won't come down
a good attitude makes no difference
Whether I believe or not doesn't mean a damn thing
either way out thing down here won't make sense
either way everyone still thinks they're right
everybody's got an answer but me
arguing with everyone who isn't there at all
and why to really bother is a mystery
why to really bother that's a slippery slope
whatever you believe or adhere to
Once upon a time it was so damn simple
all I really wanted was to get near you
Stupid windmills go ahead loom over me
Just another thing that's way beyond my scale
how dumb I used to think I had it all in hand
throw that one on the big heap
for the
fire sale


Sunday, March 19, 2017

2.1781 : 3/19/10 : Turning In

At the moment of humiliation
I see your eyes turning in
Going into a secret place of shame
the end of a road you chose to begin
I'd like five minutes with the guy
that put you in that position
the self-indulgent myth of equity in blows
at least it would be a mission
I can't help anyone so I'm turning in
sorry to whoever across the trackless gulf
I'll pray you aren't consumed by self-hate
and manage to dodge the next wolf


Saturday, March 18, 2017

2.1780 : 3/18/10 : The Wall

No getting over it
it goes to the top
no digging under
it's a hell of a drop
if you punch through the floor
needless to say
there's no door
it is there to stop you
the wall without break
and it stretches 'round the world
and Lord know what's at stake


Friday, March 17, 2017

2.1779 : 3/17/10 : Counterfeits

Comparing fine distinctions
between competing counterfeits
and getting stuck in gloomtown
and hoo the place is the pits
I tell myself the same thing everyday
hard to believe but the alternative's worse
left thinking nothing will ever change
that it is fate or a kind of curse
the rhythm isn't right but I'm stuck with it
at least for a few more lines
I ain't no kind of pretty jungle boy
swinging in on any vines
How can I believe this is the real one
and not some stupid counterfeit
How can I be sure what's happened so far
When you get right down to it


Thursday, March 16, 2017

2.1778 : 3/16/10 : Not Following the Rules

Letting stupid imaginary
people rile me up
sip sip sipping nervously
on the overflowing cup
not following the rules
not sticking to the chart
and carefully avoiding
every impulse to start
it's year after year now
after week after week
don't know what rollercoaster
I'm waiting to peak
taking on water
gladly suffering fools
playing dumb and slow
and not following the rules


Wednesday, March 15, 2017

2.1777 : 3/15/10 : A Digest

Let it be what it is
a digest of missed chances
or some example of
some second fiddle dances
I get these big ideas
then the nights get so late
and I wouldn't have come through
and so soon flows the hate
If you couldn't make me good enough
at least you could have
made me less smart
Shown me less
given me less heart
this digest is depressing me
and now it's there forever
laugh at me using that word
for this forced little


Tuesday, March 14, 2017

2.1776 : 3/14/10 : Will I Remember

Heaven forbid I be back here again
It would be a grim shock a mortal sin
One last wilding
Over and out
a night or two
with K and stout
will I remember
will it matter
will I make this
glass ceiling shatter
Can't tell now
story's not begun
get on with it
at rising sun


Monday, March 13, 2017

2.1775 : 3/13/10 : Push to Close

Get in the middle
and push to close it
the break been and gone
the snap that froze it
it ain't much but
it just keeps coming
someone else keeps strumming
as I push to close the case
and close the book
be done but still
not off the hook


Sunday, March 12, 2017

2.1774 : 3/12/10 : Run Up

Run up run down
push it all and all around
Far behind another day
close enough to plug and play
not so thrilled but
getting there
see all the excuses
Laid bare
waiting for the time to run up
hope I'm dead asleep come sun-up


2.1773 : 3/11/10 : Runway

Drop all your New York references
you were in Georgia just a month ago
Look at this robot with bad alchemy
Look down the runway watch the 15 minutes blow
Dear Lord preserve me from ending up on the runway
well you've done great at that so far
too old too short too fat
too inflexible to bend for any bar
when it gets harder than pulling someone else's teeth
You have to wonder why keep pushing
no reward and the product is unpleasing
and always this feeling something's crushing
probably making something simple complicated
could wrap it up in a New York minute
I can't be happy with succeeding every day
Pretty typical of me now innit


Friday, March 10, 2017

2.1772 : 3/10/10 : The Paradox

This live in the moment paradox
can't it just be an excuse for every bad thing
I guess you turn up with what you've got
but then does the principle mean anything
no matter how I play it will it be wrong
and nothing will really change
hearing the pathology recite that song
guess it's been too long since I felt the real exchange
I need another method very badly
I need a path I can make sense of
I need it obvious need one upside the chops
struck hard and straight with a dense glove
All kind soft things you think you understand
turn out to be all inside out
And the paradox face sure sure draws you in
but behind it's just a yawning pit of doubt


Thursday, March 09, 2017

2.1771 : 3/9/10 : Exit Sign

There's far too little of
every thing that comes to mind
and if I can't see the exit sign
I must be blind
but I've been on that
road less traveled, its bunk too
and the terrible temptation
is to give he paradigm one more act two
want want want and try to
convince myself that's the problem
by the time I face up to the decision
the better windows flew by, I missed them
what a wretched specimen
embarrassed but it's done
And I can't even tell if I
learned anything from this one


Wednesday, March 08, 2017

2.1770 : 3/8/10 : Paradigm

Run in my trick in my book
and still come up short
waited well beyond too long
this time to press abort
I miss the old diary
at least it didn't all have to rhyme
if you want to call on me well
call me the paradigm
what comes next
well it's predictable as hell
at least until tomorrow
guess I'll just pray it turns out well
what a foolish tale
of what redlined my frustration
it's not so complicated
I just need a damn vacation
but all I'll get is
this paradigm revisited
One last time I guess I'll claim
I'm sure the suspense will keep you riveted


Tuesday, March 07, 2017

2.1769 : 3/7/10 : Coattails of March

The lightest possible rain
on the coattails of March
as it breezes through the doorway
thinking I best ingest more starch
and stiffen up for the challenge
having been asked to lead
please be careful what you ask for
for I have a fearsome need
to be a benign dictator
hope you laugh to read the words
how I'll spread the word by silence
led by phalanxes of nerds
we'll create it in our own image
and if it looks like a cartoon
consider please the laser beams
reflecting off mirrors on the moon
reflect we can do anything
reflect we have the power
to ascend the heights of history
and make now our own hour


Monday, March 06, 2017

2.1768 : 3/6/10 : Forgotten Realms

I thought it would be easy
to reverse the flow
from seeming to meaning
from stop to go
I guess I've been so foolish
let so much slide
a thousand flabby verses
from my flabby hide
You know that they spend millions
making shady films
how hard we sweat trying to
bring alive forgotten realms
how I love to daydream
about my perfect bloodless coup
I better tighten up my game
I'm hardly supporting you


Sunday, March 05, 2017

2.1767 : 3/5/10 : Contract

Lord grant me the strength
to tear up the contract
and start over on my own terms
we're burning it all
will smoke or cold kill us first
the original principle: the data that confirms
we are bad at heart
we are bent on destruction
we are helpless but to consume
let me renegotiate
let me pitch a different story
let me see, it begins in a room


Saturday, March 04, 2017

2.1766 : 3/4/10 : Green Mountain

Green Mountain High
and if I die today
well so I die but say
I do recall the waking dream
a view that's good enough to scream
gazing down the precipice
Green mountain and it comes to this:
Give me your hand and we'll ascend
One and one makes three no need to end
no need to court disaster
if every day that passes goes faster
I will sigh
recollect our Green Mountain high
write it over a thousand times
I've got the days I've got the rhymes
we will drive we three
the green mountain road with glee
all glorious bottom to top
no reason to expect we'll stop


Friday, March 03, 2017

2.1765 : 3/3/10 : Fill

Fill the tank just getting there
everyone will stop and stare
watching some insane parade
everybody drink the kool aid
they are no different than me
living out this parody
filling up the hungry tube
just use plenty plenty of lube
Despite it all I'll carry on
deliver you a daily song
yeah, you've heard the thing before
I live with it and still make more
do I crave the limelight stage
to somehow turn to a simpler age
no right now is fine by me
fill today defying entropy


Thursday, March 02, 2017

2.1764 : 3/2/10 : Cynicism is Cowardly

Cynicism is cowardly
So I guess I am a coward
hiding out from hope
thwarting going forward
still I really have a question
where the optimists have gotten us
clear we've crossed a thousand lines
clear God has forgotten us
I know your criticisms
know just what you'll say
slot it with the others
fit into the sad array
I'll try to beat my cynic rap
if that's really your strategy
and though I suspect I'll end up
getting burned in effigy


Wednesday, March 01, 2017

2.1763 : 3/1/10 : Good Advice

Good advice but
it's not really what I'm up for
Why do you think I knocked
over the overflowing cup for
No it's not so easy
not simple at all
blame it on genetics
blame it on the fall
You maybe think some things up
but it's far duller than that
just a blank-eyed staring revelry
floating in the support vat


Tuesday, February 28, 2017

2.1762 : 2/28/10 : Time

Well you gotta do the time: if you want to earn the crime
yeah you've got to pull the switch: if you want to rule the bitch
Sure you have to with through: if you want to show them what you can do
Hey you have to walk the talk: because bullshit will surely balk
My oh my what do you think: that this grim ordeal has led me to the brink
Not at all my brother I'm fresh as breezes: having gotten so sick of my diseases
Once in a while I'll question my lot: want very hard what another has got
I could get shamefaced, not to transform: but pause for a minute and consider the norm
we last six or seven decades maybe eleven: many console in the inimitable doctrine of heaven
but I'm not dependent on it: So much is just all words
that swirl and shift and twist: like unruly flocks of birds
I'm not sure I'll reveal: this crazy desperate appeal
after a day so up and down: I can't find the energy for a frown
I'm thinking of preserving: this strange mood I'm serving
I'm thinking of transgressing: and begging for a blessing
I'll leave it at the steel gates: the paradigm the gold plates
and pass it at the altar: the mules in horse's halter
I'll write it on a dull strip: nothing but a slight slip
and when some trooper finds it: I'm hoping that he binds it
and writes in the grimoire: that some day may well go far
and pierce our cosmic membrane
it's for that each day I train


Monday, February 27, 2017

2.1761 : 2/27/10 : Decision Is Pain

Decision is pain
choose now or later
defer or gain
self promotion or the greater
good as a nation
we ask it all once more
look above your station
see who argues on the floor
I'm so tired of the debates
that rage behind my eyes
and the various estates
that seem to somehow catch me by surprise
I can feel my resolve slipping
knowing I could reel it back
but the drama is so gripping
and I slip up on the slack


Sunday, February 26, 2017

2.1760 : 2/26/10 : Slog

And there's not going to be
any revelations now
no changes of plan
no more lipstick on that sow
It is too late to try and
make this pattern fit
nothing to do but pile on more
as if I were born to it
this slog what a slog
pushing ever forward
I'm feeling every step
regardless what you heard of it
I've made some bad decisions
but I've been led blindly too
and I guess that'll have to hold the dike
for an hour or two


Saturday, February 25, 2017

2.1759 : 2/25/10 : All Game

I heard a man predict the future
would be all game
It sounded like a crazy nightmare
to me, who do I blame
for bringing this estate
the world of all real false
and absolute surveillance
what a hideous waltz
consider that this world
might need less points not more
and I think I'll keep my flesh intact
if the implant racket's what's in store
Less game more play
is what I want to see
real not virtual
real productivity
call me naive
or an old fashioned fool
but I'll put this one to bed
with a plain steel tool


Friday, February 24, 2017

2.1758 : 2/24/10 : Add Up

If I get one thing right, tonight
sure I'll bet
come tomorrow, how's it
going to add up
I heard in no uncertain terms
to count on nothing but the worms
that turn and turn up
like a bad cup
I should be getting past old ritual
finding some new habitual
but I keep going back over what's gone
I should shout back the night
try to get one thing right
and spare nothing but a prayer for what's wrong


Thursday, February 23, 2017

2.1757 : 2/23/10 : Fail Twice

Fail once, fail twice
I lost track before I even got close
I don't take my own advice
Pay no attention to dose
I know what's coming
I could stop it but I know I won't
and I could pass it off, say I'm slumming
but something inside says don't
fail daily, many times
I like to think I'm learning but who know?
when I hear the echo of tinny chimes
I groan oh boy, it's going to be one of those


Wednesday, February 22, 2017

2.1756 : 2/22/10 : Don't Know What I'm Doing

Maybe it can be okay
that I don't know what I'm doing anymore
Who can know tomorrow
but I might as well assume there's a lot of it in store
And it's calling right now
and I guess I'm going to answer right now
I don't know the way
to find out but the day I'm in is going to show me how


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

2.1755 : 2/21/10 : Heroes

My heroes keep dying on me
getting ever closer to home
and the fear comes on the long nights
The electric fear of the big alone
I can't say that they didn't warn me
but a warning's just a thought
while this empty knowing you are gone
is like some new disease I caught
How in the hell am I expected
to take on the extra load
I'm mad at you so angry
that you left me on this road
it's like there's no beginning to it
nor neither any end
everyday these days I just pray to God
not to lose another friend
not to lose another hero
without so much as a note
whisked away like some cruel magic trick
slipped forever in your coat


Monday, February 20, 2017

2.1754 : 2/20/10 : Fooled

Not to get fooled like that
the wizard robe, the pointed hat
makes no sense, has no history
and why I'd write another word about it
is a mystery


Sunday, February 19, 2017

2.1753 : 2/19/10 : Tough Act

It's a tough act to follow
ordinary words ring hollow
before the stage of light the world of tales
the Prince, the repertoire with which he regales
I guess I lie say nothing can stop me
truth is I'm a one-off and there's no copy
and I just pray I can live up in my own way
and I just pray I can hold on and stay
I've about had it with this tough act
I'm just a country boy and that's a fact
but I'm here and I'm not going anywhere
at least not quietly no I'll make everybody stare
if they try to drag me away from you
well lord they'll find that a tough act too


2.1752 : 2/18/10 : Insanity

I suppose I'm past pretending
that the themes I set are ending
it's a nice definition of insanity
but it's not much help
if you're already crazy


Friday, February 17, 2017

2.1751 : 2/17/10 : Worm Guts

Sick of trying to hack apart the worm
in the guts of the meat machine
something tightly coiled around my
convinces me we can do anything
That's so damn contrary
to what anyone can see
my inner cynic has to laugh out loud
well he may be a coward
Some days that seems better
to standing out in the crowd


Thursday, February 16, 2017

2.1750 : 2/16/10 : Motivation

What the hell does motivation mean
Where is the engine that's supposed to
be pushing
Should I be looking for a real good
guru, is this supposed to be some
burning bush thing
I swear I'm sick of this sickness and
that was supposed to do the trick
do I need to make a list or try
to get real pissed or just wait for
the gear to click
they sell it dear in the marketplace
you can get it on a poster or paperweight
I feel bad but I can't help but think
If I just had a little scratch I could
just delegate
whatever isn't right here, right
now well it's never and nowhere
or so I tell myself while I try
to tell myself that I
really really care


Wednesday, February 15, 2017

2.1749 : 2/15/10 : Suppose

What do I suppose I'm
looking for
as I sing myself another stumble
out the door
in another day or two
the grip of old vice will dwindle
leaving me to contemplate
slow revolutions
'round the spindle
It's not chore or
burden really
to crank out hymns
of night
but I suppose
that it's no substitute
for getting it right


2.1748 : 2/14/10 : World of Love

You dear and you alone
You introduced me to a World of Love
as it is here in the mud
so it is in the heavenly above
no matter how bad it gets
we can persist in our world of love
and it will fill and feel and fill us
fit us like a hand in glove
I'm not looking for anyone
I am unmoved by the tears of a dove
we're here in reality
it's okay: we're in a world of love
and I'll want more every day
I just cannot get enough
that's okay there's always more
because we live in a world of love


Monday, February 13, 2017

2.1747 : 2/13/10 : Damaged Goods

Everybody has a secret
everyone's lost in the woods
No one gets out without deep scars
all of us are damaged goods

Scared to take the medication
scared to tell our loved one what
monsters haunt our midnight creeping
Fears that gather like a clot

One day maybe when the world's done
and the universe is still
no more turning 'round the center
no more sentience, or acts of will

The great hand will wipe the slate clean
and the truth will be revealed
the damage in our souls is beauty
jewels placed on a level field


Sunday, February 12, 2017

2.1746 : 2/12/10 : Objective Morality

Objective morality
good luck with that one
Your tactic's fairly obvious
and you're quite low on fun
sick of everyone's agenda
sick or rhetoric
love to see the ceasing of it
if I could just get sick of being sick
If I could just dispel the darker half
if I could just accept my lot
if I could just give up my lust for wealth
as easily as you take your cheap shot
I shouldn't let it get my hackles up
it's just another song and dance
if's just another Dr. Blah blah blah
and everyone deserves their chance


Saturday, February 11, 2017

2.1745 : 2/11/10 : Hate

This world is filled with
garbage that I hate
and I don't deal with it well
I get irate
I grind my teeth
I yell inside my brain
my eyes bug out
I'm sure I look insane
someone might come along
and hate the the things I do
I hope I hope I hope it isn't you
but if it was I'd stop
not write another word
I'd sit all day and
wonder what you heard
Sometimes I look
and hate the things I've done
and by the looks of things
I'm not the only one


Friday, February 10, 2017

2.1744 : 2/10/10 : Brick Wall

Like a brick wall
across the fast lane
to reaction time
no future but pain
It's one way to
stop on a dime
to do a one eighty
to travel through time
I don't care if I
can't walk away from the crash
I just want so bad to toss
this into history's trash


Thursday, February 09, 2017

2.1743 : 2/9/10 : The Decade

You might get eight or nine or ten
No matter what anybody says
It will never come again
What may be who knows it's moot
dream of the decade
save for a new suit
one for the wedding one for the grave
I'd love to be a good example
but I can't figure out who to save
but I can't salvage
this train wreck verse
thanks anyway for trying to
scare me with the hearse


Wednesday, February 08, 2017

2.1742 : 2/8/10 : Cycles

And so the cycles start to
spin out again
and everything that's being
has already been
rush rush rush
to oblivion
Oh it's been such a long
sad times
since I was a favorite son
but I guess that I
refuse to submit
to the idea that the cycles
are the best I can get
seems certain disappointment
to want to save the world
but I'd rather be disappointed
than leave my freak flag unfurled


Tuesday, February 07, 2017

2.1741 : 2/7/10 : What Did You Ever Do For Me

You leave your begging sign
hung out 24/7
pledge a thousand dollars
guarantee your place in heaven
But what did you
ever do for me?
You barely know I exist
and you ignored my
So I'm not gonna
worry how you'll fare
Let the rest of them down here
stumble forth and stare
You remind me far too much of me
and what have I ever
really done for me?


Monday, February 06, 2017

2.1740 : 2/6/10 : Something Different

If there isn't something different in the box this time
I have sworn I'll turn this bus around upon a dime
And if I roll this mother on that hairpin switch
Depending if I walk away from that wild pitch
I've spent a good part of my life behind a desk
I've not been writing novels, or elegizing an arabesque
I've sure as hell not been finding something different
And lately my pages seem like just another place I vent


Sunday, February 05, 2017

2.1739 : 2/5/10 : Bang My Head

I think I'd maybe like to
bang my head against this wall
until I'm dumb enough to think
that I could really have it all
that I'm as likely as the next guy
that it's not all bought and sold
that my perceptions are not
speeding up how fast I'm getting old
I bang my head against
ephemera that shifts and slides
convinced that somewhere in the
middle is the nut where all truth hides
I'm not exactly getting dumber
but a little easy to predict
If I had planned it all out better
I'm not sure this is the wall
I would have picked


Saturday, February 04, 2017

2.1738 : 2/4/10 : What Really Matters

What really matters is well what really does?
Knew back in the good old days whenever that was
or maybe somewhere in the future's bright arc
we'll find the math at last, get out of the dark
There is an awful lot of pain and dismay
Things so bad I cannot face go on every day
I wish for money and for all fancy things
A maid to clean the mess up while I snatch for brass rings
What I was taught matters tells me it's a false path
But doesn't tell me how to want the road of less wrath
And I guess that I should clean whatever mess I can find
But it seems so very much more always stays left behind


Friday, February 03, 2017

2.1737 : 2/3/10 : Minutes

Spending minutes like they're printing more
don't even know what I'm avoiding anymore
No not another no not more of this
I'd rather have the razzmatazz the piece of piss
Why me let us dishonor our brothers
look at the excessive fucked in the headness of others
What the hell is wrong with these people?
I need to rise above but it's a steep hill
I need to rise above but I feel sick
I need to be the man but I feel like a dick
and the minutes pass not caring how I fare
So much more easy to waste away than to dare


Thursday, February 02, 2017

2.1736 : 2/2/10 : Postmodern

The beginning had begun to end but we didn't know it
whoever felt the cold touch didn't want to show it
the slow collapse had just begun
what comes after postmodern, we said:
fun, fun, fun
And the sun had set on easy money
for your friendly free agent poet
So is this the age of Pisces or Taurus or what
The seer had no desire to say what she saw
when the iron door shut
the disposition of the scales spoke louder than words
and the invisible finger wrote "cull the herds"
and I heard somebody finally say, man
this is a canyon not a rut
3 years after the high tide broke you know
I appeared on the scene
the prince of all who borrowed fat against
tomorrow's lean
You won't be laughing when you see my face
or grasp what it really is I aim to replace
You better place your bets: in ten short years
That slate will show, hideously clean


Wednesday, February 01, 2017

2.1735 : 2/1/10 : 1999

can you believe we were more innocent?
and then how hard things hit
and what a dent
and it seems all kinds of time
flew through such a little hole
tell ourselves an ending's
not the same thing as a goal
won't pretend it's scientific
but the cycle's flashy crash
surely predestined this outcome
innocence under the lash


Tuesday, January 31, 2017

2.1734 : 1/31/10 : Ego

If it's not about ego
then what drives ambition
I posed that to the queen
but to me she won't listen
sister's young enough to be my little sister
if you see her say
in another life I missed her
Everyone of us has got ego
and you know you know oh hoh
Yeah you know
a hard enough bite
will chase a little away
It'll all be back at you
another day


Monday, January 30, 2017

2.1733 : 1/30/10 : Ascent

Ascent too slow
trying to keep the blood from
a hard road
doing nothing and that's toiling
rising through
strata of aching pain
hope to God not to ascend
to the same old thing again


Sunday, January 29, 2017

2.1732 : 1/29/10 : Spikes

Some spikes go
right down
through the
I should be
something but
it's so hard
to hear
over the
the burning
the creak
of sinews bone
and muscles
that suddenly


Saturday, January 28, 2017

2.1731 : 1/28/10 : Black and Red and White

Black and red and white all over
I need a ton of white out to cover up the past
Not a good day, not a nice date
Not the imagined and glorious repast
There's no covering the errors that were
much less those to come
yet it seems the days stretch forth
Yes it seems I've still got some
I can't apologize so I will just hope
to find tomorrow what I could not today
and if it comes and I hope it comes
oh I will say thank you
I will say hooray


Friday, January 27, 2017

2.1730 : 1/27/10 : Guardian

Playing the guardian but
feeling so much more helpless than I thought
And feelings aren't even worth
considering and all the while I sought
Some little corner for myself
where I could just curl up and dream
a world where I've still got the touch and
things are not so much what they seem
am I shirking my job as the guardian
as I try to fix what's falling apart
my demon says there's always more to come
my angel says anything's a start
and a Power I don't trust has to be in charge
of guarding everything I can't
pray despite myself for protection
pray You don't accidentally smash this little ant


Thursday, January 26, 2017

2.1729 : 1/26/10 : Deep

Everything's so deep
you can't even see if anything
is at the bottom of it all
is worth the ruthless harrowing
what am I thinking of
how on earth to continue or stop
the dream always comes to the same
calamitous and unseen drop
and the falling that comes
is into an unreal deep
for this I run to secret worlds
for this I flee from sleep


Wednesday, January 25, 2017

2.1728 : 1/25/10 : Useful Information

So much useful information
at your fingers who can sleep
who can work who can get it on
I guess it'll all have to keep
I've got no idols no mentors
though I can't say I'm alone
but I work all day with the information
and nobody ever calls me on the phone
oh who can sleep
who can work who can get it on
I guess you could try to stuff
all the information into a song
if I pulled the plug on the information
tried to put my faith in my intuition
if I planted every seed I laid hands on
who knows what would come to fruition?


working things out on paper

So ends A Song a Day volume 2.10, Notebook 23.

The recollection of volume 2.11, Black n' Red, commences without hesitation.


Tuesday, January 24, 2017

2.1727 : 1/24/10 : Ache

I'm getting better
but there's still this ache
however perfect yesterday
there's always the next mistake
so if I seem to e
spinning my wheels all day
I am just killing time
vainly trying to wish the ache away
guess I could take a pill
or see some sort of doctor
where is fortuna now
my muse crept up and clocked her
I'll make my own luck now
and just ignore its singing
trick out my new show pony
now take what I am bringing


Monday, January 23, 2017

2.1726 : 1/23/10 : All the Angles

It is apparent from all the angles
that I am full of it
and soon will receive my reward
I am guilty of the
unbelievable crime
of coveting treasure
where treasure's stored
I am guilty of wanting solitude
I am guilty of
wanting the long goodbye
and I know it is pathetic
and I know
I am being that guy
but all the angles
have baffled
my dazzled sight
and now I'm fighting
a duller battle
try like hell not to
stay up all night


Sunday, January 22, 2017

2.1725 : 1/22/10 : Convention

Try hard to break with convention
find I shake at just the mention
of things I said I was stronger than
the dumb lack of a longer plan
I only want to loosen up
believe in the o'erflowing cup
the way things are it seems more awful
Who dies while I stuff my craw full
my lines plod like an organ's grind
and always too much in my mind
it's my convention to dwell on it
I'd love to wale like hell on wit
and rhetoric slogans and cant
but my own concrete hightops daunt
and I succumb to one last turn
convention's wheel: I pull the lynch pin


Saturday, January 21, 2017

2.1724 : 1/21/10 : Feeling the Edge

Feeling the edge again
wanting just a little more
and a moment longer
haven't I learned anything
haven't I grown even a little stronger
I suppose I know what I've ever known
it's all up to me
but who does it come down to that it
feels so unsatisfactory
you know the feeling when
all you're arguing with is you
and there's nothing left to say about it
but to figure out just what you're going to do


Friday, January 20, 2017

2.1723 : 1/20/10 : Pessimism

Had to feel good about
being the most popular pessimist
I'd be much better off
to ignore but I can't resist
but things must really endure
because the tide's not going to wait
and it will sweep you into chaos
in a moment if you hesitate
We've pulled it off before
I guess we could one last
the long term doesn't look so hot
but by then my time will be past
and if I think of something
better I will write a book
but I wouldn't lay a bet on that
so kindly let me off the hook


Thursday, January 19, 2017

2.1722 : 1/19/10 : Daze

In a daze from
failure extreme
I rose as if
from a dream
and found what
crumbs were left
to salvage
from the treble clef
I can hardly justify
a claim
I'll do better in tomorrow's name
too many irons
so little time
but turning inward at this point
is sure no crime


Wednesday, January 18, 2017

2.1721 : 1/18/10 : What Belongs in the Box

What belongs in the box tonight?
Tonight for sure in the box
Representing another another and another
representing the bullshit walks
What will be interred in the box tonight
the obvious breakdown of literal truth
try hard to explain myself
my glib responses come out uncouth
You and me in the box tonight
now just me functionally alone
There will be no further discourse there
there will be no call on the phone
in a very little while
the box will be neatly in the trash
perhaps to be exhumed someday
long after there's no longer
a trace of any splash


Tuesday, January 17, 2017

2.1720 : 1/17/10 : A Moment

I must make a moment
of this moment
here and now
a story that I'll try
to tell truthfully
Someday, somehow
but not tonight
that tale must be for later
just a moment
here and now I
still must be the instigator
So long I tried to say goodbye
to the secret world
while my thoughts
modeled the cosmos
as it slowly slowly whirled
around some hypothetical
a point just in my mind
I don't know this feeling
growing within
I can only hope it's kind
the day will come
to revisit it all
when all my resolutions falter
when I fell I'm up against
a wall
a moment just a moment
that will come
I'll remember it just fine
and call it mine
and then play dumb


Monday, January 16, 2017

2.1719 : 1/16/10 : Golden

golden that's how I feel
so sweet
and hey what will be
will be
Things are not so different now
I've made a bed
And I'm dying to sleep in it


Sunday, January 15, 2017

2.1718 : 1/15/10 : Too Quiet

Too long too slow too quiet
Today nothing to say just slow and tired
enough to just set must aside
today I'm not too thrilled about the ride


Saturday, January 14, 2017

2.1717 : 1/14/10 : End All War (2)

If I can't sing a song strong enough
to end all war then what am I good for
If I can't sing a song strong enough
to end all war then what am I good for
what am I good for what am I good for
everything we pour down the war tube
and what grinds out is predictable
and how it pays is despicable
I can't help feeling despite all my reeling that
I never did enough to stop it the ball and how we drop it
the ball and how we drop it
the ball and how we drop it
And if I can't sign a song strong enough
to end all war then what am I good for
What am I good for?
What am I good for?
What am I good for?


Friday, January 13, 2017

2.1716 : 1/13/10 : What the FXck

It ain't gonna get any better is it
too late to go wild
too big to fail
I guess I'm going to miss it
too many times
I've no stomach to fake confidence
or act as if
I've got it figured out
when in every sense
I'm on the fence
So what the fuck then
why say another word
When everything is in the air
get this: so little
though I may have hope
stone tragically
I still care


Thursday, January 12, 2017

2.1715 : 1/12/10 : Grand Master

Lucky star come round again
for the grand master
pray to God it don't take up 40 years
to clear this small disaster
put into perspective not many
have much cause to complain
but then again, then again
we all feel pain
25 years on the streets of New York
you have to wonder how a man survives
from the bomb to the camp through
the towers fall
must be he really has 9 lives
to needs so very little to live
a little pencil and paint and pen
and I am reeling in my lack
what's holding me back again
all I can do is push through
maybe someday find my own broadcaster
hope I'm better by then
hope I'm a grand master