Sunday, August 31, 2014

2.1216 : 8/31/08 : Soldier

Don’t back off: Little soldier
A little bolder flavor
a few near misses
And look: there’s your spotlight
Might seem small in the night
but dance for blown kisses
and what has gone
before is all forgiven
this isn’t dumb drama
this is my life I’m living
I’ve been a soldier all my life
before vice before whim
before I took my wife
stand at ease: little soldier
and one day even older
you’ll know how young you are now
and it won’t feel bad
and you won’t regret
Now attention we’re going to
raise that bar now


2.1215 : 8/30/08 : Fragment Five

It’s a fragment is it
one two three
four five?
we won’t know
until at least
A K deuce
and a couple hundred more
are live
and then you’ll see
what I been up to
pass me the torch
Lord we gonna laugh
when we are
on the porch


Friday, August 29, 2014

2.1214 : 8/29/08 : New Song

Before the transformation
that proceeded from within
it never would have been so
ignore that elephant and begin
to sketch the tracework bones
of the inkling of the plan
and almost before he knew it
The new song began
The distraction was outrageous
his persistence was courageous
he reverted to a format
that had rocked across the ages
he donned his cape and top hat
he dreamed his perfect at bat
like it never went for real
he could be a brand new cool cat
And he fanned his bread like
Daddy Warbucks’ new song new deal
50 percent less making sense
A hundred times more sex appeal


Thursday, August 28, 2014

2.1213 : 8/28/08 : Good Decisions

Do you remember how it felt
to make good decisions
Did it feel like loss
or like finally getting it
don’t go thinking I’m
dull as dirt
cause sure as anything by
dusk I’ll be hitting it
sometimes it goes slow
like cold molasses
Every word like
pulling a tooth
and my day to day
takes flight and blows away
as ungraspable as my fleeting youth
leaving the option of
good decisions, vowing
to extract every drop
of marrow from
the skeletons and skulls
of the latest heaving
bloody breathing crop


Wednesday, August 27, 2014

2.1212 : 8/27/08 : Beauty Appears

Despite the paucity of common sense
Despite a line that stretches 20 years
On any evening anywhere at all
Despite everything beauty appears
I saw it in you every single day
And every moment that it shone through
I stored a thousand words away
the beauty that appeared was you
the beauty of the hills I walked
the heights I knew lights in the sky
I have been present for every instant
and not a moment has passed me by
be my co-conspirator
to travel at this sacred behest
to sew this mission to the wind
more beauty all made manifest
we are not controlled by chance
we are not the sum of fears
we are what remains when
the veil parts and beauty appears


Tuesday, August 26, 2014

personal account books

The Solipsist marks the end of Volume 2.7 - Seven. The songs will continue tomorrow with Volume 2.8 - Record (II).


2.1211 : 8/26/08 : The Solipsist

Tonight’s the night I’m gonna kill the solipsist
in punishment for every scrap and crumb I missed
from circling the bowl of ugly self-deceit
I’ve chewed over my bowl of chaff now onto meat
I’ve seen all of the dirty trash on easy hire
and law enforced with gasoline in an old tire
there’s very little difference life worth zero
there’s no such thing as winning there is no hero
he makes a lot of cardinal moments and hard truth
pretends to be iconoclastic, dark, uncouth
he’s only expert of one subject such a bore
the word that comes most readily to mind is whore
if every conclusion reads as artifice
too many recollections of every near miss
the solipsist will tell me how he saw it come
and if I think I’m through with him I sure am dumb


Monday, August 25, 2014

2.1210 : 8/25/08 : The Dream

3,399 : 45 ?

They all say I’m
Living the dream
only platinum and diamond bling
sipping the cream
they don’t know
every bit means jack
every single one of us
is clawing up the stack
no one will remember me
no one will regret
not saying a single thing to me
or missing me I bet
the dream is just a name you gave
to some straight fantasy
that’s not happening to anyone
least of all to me
They all say I
went too high not to fall
nobody picks up anymore
When I call
but I know the secret
it’s still just the same
they got you coming and going
and you can’t sit out the game


2.1209 : 8/24/08 : This Can’t Go On

This can’t go on
well what does
abstract garble
every little bird
may warble
sounded better
strung on backward
yeah it’s messed up
yeah it’s all hard


2.1208 : 8/23/08 : Business

It’s just business
the business of being
I’m hung up on something
I can’t put my finger
on the name to put on it
and uncertainties linger
am I in the right business
am I hearing the calling
or is it just the whistling
of the interminable falling


Friday, August 22, 2014

2.1207 : 8/22/08 : This Is Progress

This is progress
jumping the inevitable gun
Still so long over after
the setting sun
better would be better
ten long years
come on Diana
go get her
so artificial
feels like trivia
the spaces within
vast unbelievable
an increment better
the width of a hair
at least setting me free
to just sit and stare


Thursday, August 21, 2014

2.1206 : 8/21/08 : In A Row

7, 8, 9
bloody minded
last ditch
pitches in a row
Far as my eye sees
bitches with a hoe
a rake
a scythe
a stake
that looks quite
ready for my heart
You tell me
is it merely form
or is it art?


Wednesday, August 20, 2014

2.1205 : 8/20/08 : Whose Fool

Whose fool am I anyway
Searching aimless
daydreaming my life away
I can’t even give my
secret project a name
and I’m caught up bad
in the game
I need to space out
and dive in
obedient to the voice within
far too much cognitive pollution
there is no goal
there is no solution
there is no God
that could be confined within one church
there is no knocking me
off this new perch
no name, fuck it
I am golden
quantum free agent
to none beholden


2.1204 : 8/19/08 : Nope

not it
I don’t give a shit
write on
a fucking
with lipstick


Monday, August 18, 2014

2.1203 : 8/18/08 : The Data Point

3,394 : 39 ?

I got no intention of tuning in
turning on dropping out
wherever you may go
you know the rest
it won’t tell you a thing
of what it’s all about
running my mouth
in all the time out of joint
trying to wrap my head
around the data point
Ignore the obvious stuff
put off another day
Yeah here we go again
talking philosophy, hurray
racing the devil
the time out of joint
trying to get a piece of
the data point


Sunday, August 17, 2014

2.1202 : 8/17/08 : So What

You again
so what?
at least not that again
Yes but
I don’t feel nothing in
my gut
it’s just
again again
so what?


2.1201 : 8/16/08 : Nothing At All

Nothing at all
The answers aren’t answers
the solutions are bunk
the movements are all standstill
and the treasure is all junk
I can’t believe I’m thinking
wasting moments wasting brain
I might as well pound sand with hammers
sit in the dark and complain
maybe the world is doomed
or only civilization
maybe it will take a hundred years
no bearing on my situation
maybe I’m just here fiddling
in a deck chair on my own Titanic
I am a speck of dust
and all these problems are gigantic


2.1200 : 8/15/08 : Little Fish

Nobody can come between me
and my little fish
I pine for my ambition
hey maybe someday for that dish
pretty sure I’ll never be
the fat suit in that glass tower
well it makes me
a little crazy
but little fish and me got our own power
I spent a long time alone
this is my comeuppance
been looking at it all the wrong way
as vitae interruptus
while we all make other plans
What we get is life
me and my little fish
something like paradise


Thursday, August 14, 2014

2.1199 : 8/14/08 : Never Again

Never again
not anymore
no not what you might think
but just as big a bore
Why do I dig this tube
why do I drink this drink
Consider the damn thing
isn’t at all what I think
just a dream I had
a face was full of fire
maybe some better comes
down on the better wire


Wednesday, August 13, 2014

2.1198 : 8/13/08 : No Matter

No matter what I can’t seem
to beat that trend
half luck half laziness
it turns out the same in the end
always something piling up
as I cut something else down
always end up saying hell with it
So let’s paint the town
write about it isn’t helping
sing about it isn’t helping
it’s so pissant anyway
the sorry way I’m yelping
I’m the only suspect in this
judging by the splatter
that nobody will see but me
but so it is, no matter


2.1197 : 8/12/08 : Death Ray

Maybe we could solve
all our problems with a death ray
all these problematic people
why they’d just go away
I don’t see why we would stop
until everything is perfect
substitute my reality
for yours I must reject
If I could focus all the hate
you feel on any road
and concentrate it on your
stupid head in hopes it will explode
maybe you should not put your
death ray into my hands
everywhere I look
the target that I see expands


Monday, August 11, 2014

2.1196 : 8/11/08 : What You Said

3,387 : 32 ?

What you said
what you said
and why did I
want to see it
well I don’t know
I never really listened
but that’s
no sin


Sunday, August 10, 2014

2.1195 : 8/10/08 : Sympathy

Sympathy for the songs
stuck in my head
I’m sure we’d both be happier
if you were somewhere else instead
But how I wish
I’d written you for my own
forever humming
someone else’s rolling stone
maybe the words
don’t really matter so much
as melody timing
and that magic touch
and if it turns all these
are denied to me
I hope at least I’ll get
your sympathy


2.1194 : 8/9/08 : Wish

What’s it to you
if I say a wish
down on my knees today
I have my way
and you have yours
we all end up
going through the same doors
I’ve seen this premonition
So it seems
in something not quite memory
not quite dreams
and though I pray
with scarce a clue
oh my story
my wish came true


Friday, August 08, 2014

2.1193 : 8/8/08 : The Common Sentiment

Why do I resist so much
the common sentiment
the touch
of love of simple
homely joy
ever since I was a
little boy
it’s not I’m so high minded
just lost between
things above, below
and I know
I’m losing something by it
and not just a hit
in person I am
closer to true
and to you who count
know I love you


Thursday, August 07, 2014

2.1192 : 8/7/08 : Optimism

If I could just control my mind
optimism would not be
so hard to find
but dropped rocks fall
and chemicals squirt
and I guess it’s just the consequence
of being made of dirt
who knows whether
choice is real
if anyone can really
help how they feel
who knows if value
or always dissipates
to lukewarm mists
but that’s no way to think about
So I’ll just pray that it all works out


Wednesday, August 06, 2014

2.1191 : 8/6/08 : Fog

I’ve got no idea how
high this hill is
lost in the fog of
whatever real is
just before the stream
of nonsense words
I though I saw you pocketing
the gospel birds
I know you think all this
religious stuff’s just fog
and I’m dreaming to think I’ll ever
hunt with that dog
most of everything I see
is paint and flashing light
and the light of love is purer
but not near so bright


Tuesday, August 05, 2014

2.1190 : 8/5/08 : Troubles

Is this any way to
respond to troubles
as I’m marking time and
the stubble’s growing on my neck
if I had time to think
I’d nod at how things can stink
and I might get mad as heck
but when troubles come in torrents
I batten down
and despite your snide contempt
get my knees to the ground
You must live through it all
that’s the only rule
until your race is run
and you’re done with this school


Monday, August 04, 2014

2.1189 : 8/4/08 : Gape

3,380 : 25 ?

a thousand circles made of
wire and tape
towering structures fit to
make you gape
tension armatures
bakelite keys
pinioned joints like
insect knees
automatons of
dead end tech
clean as glass wings
not a speck
look inhuman
look unreal
mecha sunburst
under the peel


Sunday, August 03, 2014

2.1188 : 8/3/08 : One More Thing

One more thing before I
fake some change again
rearrange again
those deck chairs on this
ill-starred boat
hell why not pretend
I’ll really pull it through
outfox or bull it through
swim somehow across the moat


2.1187 : 8/2/08 : The Book

In my heart that
irritating small voice
says by the book
maybe if you let me
find the damn thing
and take a look
I’ve heard about it
read about it even
ha ha funny
been told it’s not
about recognition
not about power
or money
So I’ll go by
my poor fake book
pretend not to
what you left out
what you took


Friday, August 01, 2014

2.1186 : 8/1/08 : Work Backwards

Work backwards
start at the end and
imagine how such a thing could come about
think backwards
try to keep some friends that
will stick by you if it turns into a rout
I’m thinking of a suspicious method
will the authorities think this death odd?
the locked room the enigma
I think I’ve given up on self-concept
I think I’m resigned to mediocre and inept
I used to be a tau now I’m just a sigma