2.1672 : 11/30/09 : How Long

Head's in a press and feel
coated with something
a stink I picked up yesterday
while I was busy doing nothing
one night on the rack
left me bent over and aching
and the hell of it's the treatment
didn't even bring me close to breaking
how long? And King David asked how long?
this far in the only certainty
I feel is what I think's the answer's wrong
make haste to pick something
make haste to get it right
I've been so careful not to waste
I cannot get to sleep at night
the millstone's heavy but it rolls okay
it'll take far more for me to snap
and I may look ridiculous
but I'm a very busy sap

what

2.1671 : 11/29/09 : Picky

Telling me to pick
it's good advice
but I'm so picky
and when I open
up the box the mess inside
is very sticky
Seems it would be
obvious but it is not
all the blind paths
I've been down were cold then hot
then cold then hot
always feeling out of time
but time reels on
relentlessly
but if I said
I'd really tried I'd
say it disingenuously
trying anything
would have to be
better than nothing, right?
my struggling to
grasp this is the
hallmark of ten thousand nights

2.1670 : 11/28/09 : Expected

4,227 : 8 : ?



Maybe I expected elevators
into space by now
computers that could answer back
the end of scarcity somehow
once upon a time the 21st
seemed so very remote
now it's yesterday's news
guess what, still in the same boat
expectations expectations
don't play that game near as much
the same hand picks my pocket
the same bums make the touch
the same old black and white game
expected what? I can't say
maybe if I thought it through
I wouldn't even expect today

what

2.1669 : 11/27/09 : Another

I can't persist in this
coveting the words of another
coveting the success of another
coveting the gains of another
oh won't you tell me
where I'm supposed to find mine brother
Another day another, another
You can't chase glory all the time
and you can't make a meal of thyme
and you can't help but repeat your words
and ideas rise, scatter like birds
and if you don't already know by now
another man's bound to take your bow
because something persists but we don't
someone will be there but we won't
and if I had another crack at it all
I might be tempted to just take my ball
but I'd probably do it all the same
not exactly happy but still glad I came

what

2.1668 : 11/26/09 : Show

I took this show on the road
my head was fixed on the gauge
Points racked just for showing up
Points rack up natural as age
Nobody's watching no
Look nobody cares
You've got to screw up worse than that
then everybody stares
modest and quiet success
nobody gives a hoot
you got to get on the road
you got to aim and shoot
but I'm so satisfied
yeah I'm so bland, serene
I am a thousand times
bigger than any scene
You want to show me something
you better look here first
here's all heavy truth on you
Answer all calls with thirst

what

2.1667 : 11/25/09 : Potter

Determined to be the potter
assured I am the clay
how long ago did I forget
to only want to play
I think I'd love to be bent
to a powerful will
love to be a useful vessel
been trying to run things long enough
stuck grinding in this stress hell
hope I don't get cut off the wheel
tossed into the pug mill
clay's not supposed to care
but pulling out the rug will
cost you more than one poor vessel
sure the word will get around
if you leave me spinning endlessly
or tread my substance to the ground

what

2.1666 : 11/24/09 : Often

Every so often
shake off all the guff
must and ought
the smooth and rough
Every so often
give up without a fight
Wave easy and careless
So long to this night

what

2.1665 : 11/23/09 : Maybe Nothing

Maybe all won't be well
maybe it will all be rotten
Keep on fishing out the sea
and stripping out the land for cotton
There's sure been plenty of pride
enough to forecast a fall
and maybe nothing will
come up at all
those to whom begging lacks
the conventional aversion
may wind up getting the best
of the grim conversion
back to just scraping by
back to always back against the wall
maybe for the rest
maybe nothing will come up at all

what

2.1664 : 11/22/09 : Fable

Surely this must be madness
a righteous fable
find my optimism
ready willing and able
again balanced like an angel on a pin
I'm not trying to get in
so if I look is it a sin?
The hour has come up
I'm in the thick once more
And only one direction can exist
and it points to the floor
Very close and comforting cool
a place to lie select the proper tool
I hope to do better
another day
hope to rise
and
hope to stay

what

2.1663 : 11/21/09 : Flip

4,220 : 1 ?



I can't believe how close
you've come to getting me to flip
and for nothing at all
I confess you run a tight ship
maybe I'm fooling myself
I mean worse than I know I am
I said this day would come
yeah I believed in it like flying ham

If I prayed every morning and I prayed every night
And in secret every noontime
would you show me the sight
some way to have it fast
soe way that's sufficient
it doesn't seem to be so much
you know they tell me you're omniscient

They tell me that you care
well down here that's a tricky sell
they told me that you told some dame
that all would be well
And I do have so much to be thankful for
but I'm struggling with my grip
I guess I better hit the floor
and pray they do not make me flip

what

2.1662 : 11/20/09 : Day Brings

In over your head
missing the old days
slave to simple vices
damned by faint praise
things are too complicated
never time to really think
always well aware
of how bad your shit can stink
I won't figure it out tonight
I won't figure it out tomorrow
however hard I push my pennance
it won't save me a lick of sorrow
bring it all upon myself
saw it coming far away
read the writing on the wall
jumped right in it right away
and found I was in over my head
knowing old days are long lost
and every day brings its own worries
and every day brings a harder frost

what

2.1661 : 11/19/09 : King Folly

Perhaps the root of the king's problem
was that he could express but one sorrow
to find words for all the other pain
he had no recourse but to borrow
Like the keys to the Kingdom
arrayed at intervals along a chain
the daring to unlock all hidden heartbreaks
the daring to reveal the ugly stain
Oh King Folly oh the half created
world of stories killed mid sentence
Oh dear denizen of night there is a
gulf between shame and repentance
there is something in this court
a real spirit words with meaning
I fear it gets recycled daily
lost in the gloss of the daily cleaning
So are you going to open up
do you even know just how?
If not then what King Folly
and when then if not now?

what

2.1660 : 11/18/09 : Crystal

What happened when the lens
became crystal clear and -oh God -
what I saw appear
the things I had to drop
and just stop
no explanation or goodbye
and that was tough
because I am a standup guy
now it feels like crystal
is inside my head
illumnating nooks and crannies
I thought safely put to bed
a real long time ago
turns out it wasn't so
If the dream exploded
and fell back to earth
And its husk put on a stick
and subjected to mirth
forgotten in a box
pushed back on a high shelf
If it's looking beaten up I've got
no one to blame but myself

what

2.1659 : 11/17/09 : Exhausted

The hopper on this

time machine is

wholly exhausted

there might have been a point

some time ago

you know I lost it

No space to get fancy oh no

No time to get cute

the hourglass is busted and

we’re barreling

right down the chute

what

2.1658 : 11/16/09 : What to Do with a $10 Gift Certificate to Walmart

Principles are great

but hunger’s real

think about not having enough

think about how you’d feel

Spend it on food 

give it to the poor

ignore the big picture

strangely you feel you have more

A thousand dilemmas

who can guess what’s really right

it keeps me guessing

it keeps me up all night

I’ll make the great chart

I’ll figure it out

the devil will be damned

it’s going to be a god damned rout

I’ll be here again

none to tweak the circumstances

a thousand and one hours

makes a thousand and one chances

forget about what you read

in some old moldy book

I’m going to make the video

that makes

everyone want to buy

the Book

what

2.1657 : 11/15/09 : Tribute

Tribute to the end of endings

tribute to the wasted chances

whatever it takes who knows what I’ve got

stand back I’m keeping the strange romances

I’ve got a grain of optimism

At a crossing I refuse to kill it

Half a surprise I’m happy enough

Now whatever flows I’m going to spill it

Maybe now I’ve jinxed the magic

Gone lukewarm and ripe for spitting

Go go go for whatever’s going

better get while the good is getting

what

2.1656 : 11/14/09 : Book

4,213 : 27 ?

It doesn’t seem to be

in a book or a magazine

and it’s been so long since I felt

like a smooth machine

running for a purpose

built for function

long lost miles past

the last known junction

So what is there

worthwhile to write about

words for words sake

nothing but dissent and doubt

nothing but frustration

angry and a long face

couldn’t be duller

couldn’t be a dumber place

to try to create

conditions I might just know from a book

maybe never real

maybe I’m afraid to take a look

maybe they were all right

maybe my highest perception

was always delusion

from the moment of its first inception

what

2.1655 : 11/13/09 : Haste

Harried to haste

and must heed

time’s right and I’m

riding a rough steed

but I don’t mind and it’s all good

I’m all about willing

and immune to should

what

2.1654 : 11/12/09 : Good As New

Could anything make me good as new

Was new all that good anyway

Was there some ideal point I drowned in the late night smoke

How pointless is it to think this way

What’s eating me from the inside

what’s bolixed up the pipes this time

what keeps me from singing pure

from chasing down the obvious

fearing final failure or just a missed rhyme

Good as new good as new what a lovely idea

no meaning behind it a slogan to chant

some stuff I read said it’s maybe the afterlife

but if the science comes through maybe you want to recant

There’s no flush out no nano-resurrection

I suspect things will stay dull and continue

I’ll get old like any other, suffer for my

self neglect, for abusing the machine

Something I read put a thought in my mind

wouldn’t you really like to be good as new

Be a kid again but wise like I am now

What a silly wasteful daydream it’s true

what

2.1653 : 11/11/09 : Dare

Do I dare to look

at random chance I engineered

I know I won’t believe

what in a soft credulous

moment appeared

a moment of daring just

is not enough

And I guess that its detritus

will be scattered along with

all the other stuff

what

2.1652 : 11/10/09 : Real Life

I don’t know why I do things anymore

Still evade the obvious

Still ignore wide open doors

an old way passed away but

nothing arose to replace it

and as far as I can tell about what’s going on

I can’t face it

We can’t get it together

we can’t deal with real life

I thought the future would be so cool

now it’s the present and just more strife

And the now-present future’s future

doesn’t look so hot these days

maybe that’s just middle age

or the way everyone pays and pays

want to believe I didn’t wait too long

who really knows, no guarantees

maybe I should just play after all

leave real life to the birds and bees

what

2.1651 : 11/9/09 : Streak

When I realized my mistake

I cursed a blue streak

if you enjoy schadenfreude, pal

Well peel the lid back and take a peek

what

2.1650 : 11/8/09 : Behind the Curtain

I can’t stop looking

behind the curtain

though nobody has been

back there for years

the chair at the switchboard’s empty

and I’m fairly certain

it’s down to random chance

when that giant head appears

It says nothing anymore

it just stares down at you

until it fades like

evening sun

a mocking silence left

it’s almost daring you

to ask it for help

like you’re the chosen one

and there’s nobody here

no not anyone at all

to tell you how to do

the magic to get home

somehow he rose up and out

left you to take the fall

left nothing behind but

riddles in a dusty tome

what

2.1649 : 11/7/09 : Put An End

I’d like to put an end to something

there’s so much left going on

I’ve got to pick and choose and be circumspect

and think hard about what’s already been and gone

In the hour of my revival when I

run up to the front of the tent

i might turn around and shout April fools

Man I’m already saved so you all get bent

I’ve got mine and still want more

damn me for a greed-headed jerk

I want it all without the weight of fame

Without the burden of chance or the pain of work

I know I’m crazy drowned in dumb daydreams

I don’t know what the hell my problem is

there’s serious stuff going down out there

So many a man would love to trade my life for his

So many pointlessly denied so much

I’ve got so little right to complain

Yet it doesn’t make a difference if I feel bad

So why the hell should I sign up for pain

I’d like to put an end to something

but nothing important is mine to end

and that’s one way I guess I’m just like you

the same wind going to make us both bend

what

2.1648 : 11/6/09 : Breaking Lord Midnight

I almost became the

one that I fought

and that irony was

palpable I thought

with barely moments

to set the thing right

I committed myself

to breaking Lord Midnight

My star didn’t ascend

my path wasn’t made plain

I was washed out and weakened

by sickness and rain

but I slogged anyway

to another high tower

to confront the great lord

of the witching hour

I said oh Lord Midnight

I have to break your spell

well he twirled his curling mustache

and said well well well

kid it’s not my magic

that keeps you in thrall

and you may break me but

it won’t solve your problems at all

that’s as may be

well you may be right

So I said to the retreating

back of Lord Midnight

I guess I better learn some

new songs and dances

with nothing left to break

I’m really taking my chances

what

2.1647 : 11/5/09 : Doing It Wrong

Not lists not systems no not

any sort of thing that can be written down

Shoulda been bold and stopped there

So sad now you’re guaranteed to end with a frown

I want a quick fix oh

but I’m doing it wrong

I’m doing it wrong

but I’ve been doing it so long

not a quota not an experience

you can’t pay to attend a seminar

you might as well watch teevee for two weeks

you might as well pass out in a bar

I want a quick fix oh

but I’m doing it wrong
I'm doing it wrong

but I’ve been doing it for so long

Go back and start all over

nothing new there nothing new there

figure out how much you can take

because you’re going to have to take all you can bear

I want a quick fix oh

but I’m doing it wrong

I’m doing it wrong

but I’ve been doing it so long

I want a quick fix but

I’m doing it wrong

I’m doing it wrong

but I’ve been doing it so

long

what

2.1646 : 11/4/09 : Crush

Something nasty

to get the juices flowing

Something rotten and wrong

a little crush

harmless imagined

nobody damaged

nobody the wiser for my rush

a little weaker

a little set back

locked up in this room

fetch me a rag

bleach in a bottle

fetch me a dust pan and broom

I can’t seem to be at midnight

the night’s evidence I flush

stretching the hour a little longer

avoiding all thoughts

of my crush

what

2.1645 : 11/3/09 : Elevating News

Don’t give me anything

but elevating news

I’ve had enough  of reason

had enough of blues

tell me a joke

something to warm my heart

it probably can’t fix this affliction

but it may be a start

send me pictures of cute animals

dressed up as people

I’m going to raise an LOL flag

up my steeple

I’ve hadn’t seen it myself

I would not believe it was true

Take a look at this high Master

grab your own celestial venue

once I’ve mastered optimism

I will hang out my own shingle

run my hands over the cards for you

till something starts to tingle

when you have my elevating news

all the great stuff you have in store

you’re going to be hooked instantly

you surely will be back for more

what

2.1644 : 11/2/09 : If You Hurry

Don’t compare yourself to the other one

don’t compare yourself to anyone

It isn’t worth a thing to worry

And it’s a place you can’t get to if you hurry

while you were making 15 it’s one through twenty

rust and weeds were fighting it out on the horn of plenty

now that you’re back don’t waste any more time

You’ve got a long while still left in you prime

There’s no harm in acting as if everything happens for a reason

it might just help you understand each change in season

no surprise they’re throwing roadblocks in your way

you best believe I will smash everyone today

I should have known well I was sick and I was tired

I will not hurry I’ll just push till your bid is retired

And get on with getting over the latest affliction

And you will hear me speak unhurried an

with perfect diction

what

2.1643 : 11/1/09 : Intercession

Failing belief in material intercession

It seems likely I’m saddled for the long haul

And it’s unseemly to complain about minor affliction

but it prefigures the reaper and his gory maul

but it prefigures the the horrifying world

no protection from pitiless chance

no intercession and a horrifying world

don’t expect praises, don’t expect to dance

I could be coughing away my life here

wouldn’t make any difference, I’d be in the same

boat with you

I don’t know it that’s a mark for or against you

I don’t know I can make any sense of what you do

And I reckon I’ll survive this one just like the rest

hell I used to do it sucking up smoke

but I’m leaving it up to you to come up with an argument

that the lack of intercession doesn’t make you act

kind of a joke

what