2.1216 : 8/31/08 : Soldier

Don’t back off: Little soldier

A little bolder flavor

a few near misses

And look: there’s your spotlight

Might seem small in the night

but dance for blown kisses

and what has gone

before is all forgiven

this isn’t dumb drama

this is my life I’m living

I’ve been a soldier all my life

before vice before whim

before I took my wife

stand at ease: little soldier

and one day even older

you’ll know how young you are now

and it won’t feel bad

and you won’t regret

Now attention we’re going to

raise that bar now

what

2.1215 : 8/30/08 : Fragment Five

It’s a fragment is it

one two three

four five?

we won’t know

until at least

A K deuce

and a couple hundred more

are live

and then you’ll see

what I been up to

pass me the torch

Lord we gonna laugh

someday

when we are

rocking

on the porch

what

2.1214 : 8/29/08 : New Song

Before the transformation

that proceeded from within

it never would have been so

ignore that elephant and begin

to sketch the tracework bones

of the inkling of the plan

and almost before he knew it

The new song began

The distraction was outrageous

his persistence was courageous

he reverted to a format

that had rocked across the ages

he donned his cape and top hat

he dreamed his perfect at bat

like it never went for real

he could be a brand new cool cat

And he fanned his bread like

Daddy Warbucks’ new song new deal

50 percent less making sense

A hundred times more sex appeal

what

2.1213 : 8/28/08 : Good Decisions

Do you remember how it felt

to make good decisions

Did it feel like loss

or like finally getting it

don’t go thinking I’m

dull as dirt

cause sure as anything by

dusk I’ll be hitting it

sometimes it goes slow

like cold molasses

Every word like

pulling a tooth

and my day to day

takes flight and blows away

as ungraspable as my fleeting youth

leaving the option of

good decisions, vowing

to extract every drop

of marrow from

the skeletons and skulls

of the latest heaving

bloody breathing crop

what

2.1212 : 8/27/08 : Beauty Appears

Despite the paucity of common sense

Despite a line that stretches 20 years

On any evening anywhere at all

Despite everything beauty appears

I saw it in you every single day

And every moment that it shone through

I stored a thousand words away

the beauty that appeared was you

the beauty of the hills I walked

the heights I knew lights in the sky

I have been present for every instant

and not a moment has passed me by

be my co-conspirator

to travel at this sacred behest

to sew this mission to the wind

more beauty all made manifest

we are not controlled by chance

we are not the sum of fears

we are what remains when

the veil parts and beauty appears

what

personal account books

The Solipsist marks the end of Volume 2.7 - Seven. The songs will continue tomorrow with Volume 2.8 - Record (II).

what

2.1211 : 8/26/08 : The Solipsist

Tonight’s the night I’m gonna kill the solipsist

in punishment for every scrap and crumb I missed

from circling the bowl of ugly self-deceit

I’ve chewed over my bowl of chaff now onto meat

I’ve seen all of the dirty trash on easy hire

and law enforced with gasoline in an old tire

there’s very little difference life worth zero

there’s no such thing as winning there is no hero

he makes a lot of cardinal moments and hard truth

pretends to be iconoclastic, dark, uncouth

he’s only expert of one subject such a bore

the word that comes most readily to mind is whore

if every conclusion reads as artifice

too many recollections of every near miss

the solipsist will tell me how he saw it come

and if I think I’m through with him I sure am dumb

what

2.1210 : 8/25/08 : The Dream

3,399 : 45 ?

They all say I’m

Living the dream

only platinum and diamond bling

sipping the cream

they don’t know

every bit means jack

every single one of us

is clawing up the stack

no one will remember me

no one will regret

not saying a single thing to me

or missing me I bet

the dream is just a name you gave

to some straight fantasy

that’s not happening to anyone

least of all to me

They all say I

went too high not to fall

nobody picks up anymore

When I call

but I know the secret

it’s still just the same

they got you coming and going

and you can’t sit out the game

what

2.1209 : 8/24/08 : This Can’t Go On

This can’t go on

well what does

every

always

abstract garble

every little bird

may warble

sounded better

strung on backward

yeah it’s messed up

yeah it’s all hard

what

2.1208 : 8/23/08 : Business

It’s just business

the business of being

running

fighting

believing

seeing

I’m hung up on something

I can’t put my finger

on the name to put on it

and uncertainties linger

am I in the right business

am I hearing the calling

or is it just the whistling

of the interminable falling

what

2.1207 : 8/22/08 : This Is Progress

This is progress

jumping the inevitable gun

Still so long over after

the setting sun

better would be better

ten long years

come on Diana

go get her

so artificial

feels like trivia

the spaces within

vast unbelievable

an increment better

the width of a hair

at least setting me free

to just sit and stare

what

2.1206 : 8/21/08 : In A Row

7, 8, 9

bloody minded

last ditch

pitches in a row

Far as my eye sees

bitches with a hoe

a rake

a scythe

a stake

that looks quite

ready for my heart

You tell me

is it merely form

or is it art?

what

2.1205 : 8/20/08 : Whose Fool

Whose fool am I anyway

Searching aimless

daydreaming my life away

I can’t even give my

secret project a name

and I’m caught up bad

in the game

I need to space out

unplug

and dive in

obedient to the voice within

far too much cognitive pollution

there is no goal

there is no solution

there is no God

that could be confined within one church

there is no knocking me

off this new perch

no name, fuck it

I am golden

quantum free agent

and

to none beholden

what

2.1204 : 8/19/08 : Nope

Nope

not it

same

same

I don’t give a shit

pointless

vain

solipsistic

write on

a fucking

mirror

with lipstick

what

2.1203 : 8/18/08 : The Data Point

3,394 : 39 ?

I got no intention of tuning in

turning on dropping out

wherever you may go

you know the rest

it won’t tell you a thing

of what it’s all about

running my mouth

in all the time out of joint

trying to wrap my head

around the data point

Ignore the obvious stuff

put off another day

Yeah here we go again

talking philosophy, hurray

racing the devil

the time out of joint

trying to get a piece of

the data point

what

2.1202 : 8/17/08 : So What

You again

so what?

at least not that again

Yes but

I don’t feel nothing in

my gut

it’s just

again again

so what?

what

2.1201 : 8/16/08 : Nothing At All

Nothing at all

The answers aren’t answers

the solutions are bunk

the movements are all standstill

and the treasure is all junk

I can’t believe I’m thinking

wasting moments wasting brain

I might as well pound sand with hammers

sit in the dark and complain

maybe the world is doomed

or only civilization

maybe it will take a hundred years

no bearing on my situation

maybe I’m just here fiddling

in a deck chair on my own Titanic

I am a speck of dust

and all these problems are gigantic

what

2.1200 : 8/15/08 : Little Fish

Nobody can come between me

and my little fish

I pine for my ambition

hey maybe someday for that dish

pretty sure I’ll never be

the fat suit in that glass tower

well it makes me

a little crazy

but little fish and me got our own power

I spent a long time alone

this is my comeuppance

been looking at it all the wrong way

as vitae interruptus

while we all make other plans

What we get is life

me and my little fish

something like paradise

what

2.1199 : 8/14/08 : Never Again

Never again

not anymore

no not what you might think

but just as big a bore

Why do I dig this tube

why do I drink this drink

Consider the damn thing

isn’t at all what I think

just a dream I had

a face was full of fire

maybe some better comes

down on the better wire

what

2.1198 : 8/13/08 : No Matter

No matter what I can’t seem

to beat that trend

half luck half laziness

it turns out the same in the end

always something piling up

as I cut something else down

always end up saying hell with it

So let’s paint the town

write about it isn’t helping

sing about it isn’t helping

it’s so pissant anyway

the sorry way I’m yelping

I’m the only suspect in this

judging by the splatter

that nobody will see but me

but so it is, no matter

what

2.1197 : 8/12/08 : Death Ray

Maybe we could solve

all our problems with a death ray

all these problematic people

why they’d just go away

I don’t see why we would stop

until everything is perfect

substitute my reality

for yours I must reject

If I could focus all the hate

you feel on any road

and concentrate it on your

stupid head in hopes it will explode

maybe you should not put your

death ray into my hands

everywhere I look

the target that I see expands

what

2.1196 : 8/11/08 : What You Said

3,387 : 32 ?

What you said

oh

what you said

and why did I

want to see it

again

well I don’t know

maybe

I never really listened

but that’s

no sin

what

2.1195 : 8/10/08 : Sympathy

Sympathy for the songs

stuck in my head

I’m sure we’d both be happier

if you were somewhere else instead

But how I wish

I’d written you for my own

forever humming

someone else’s rolling stone

maybe the words

don’t really matter so much

as melody timing

and that magic touch

and if it turns all these

are denied to me

I hope at least I’ll get

your sympathy

what

2.1194 : 8/9/08 : Wish

What’s it to you

if I say a wish

down on my knees today

I have my way

and you have yours

we all end up

going through the same doors

I’ve seen this premonition

So it seems

in something not quite memory

not quite dreams

and though I pray

with scarce a clue

oh my story

my wish came true

what

2.1193 : 8/8/08 : The Common Sentiment

Why do I resist so much

the common sentiment

the touch

of love of simple

homely joy

ever since I was a

little boy

it’s not I’m so high minded

no

just lost between

things above, below

and I know

I’m losing something by it

and not just a hit

in person I am

closer to true

and to you who count

know I love you

what

2.1192 : 8/7/08 : Optimism

If I could just control my mind

optimism would not be

so hard to find

but dropped rocks fall

and chemicals squirt

and I guess it’s just the consequence

of being made of dirt

who knows whether

choice is real

if anyone can really

help how they feel

who knows if value

persists

or always dissipates

to lukewarm mists

but that’s no way to think about

So I’ll just pray that it all works out

what

2.1191 : 8/6/08 : Fog

I’ve got no idea how

high this hill is

lost in the fog of

whatever real is

just before the stream

of nonsense words

I though I saw you pocketing

the gospel birds

I know you think all this

religious stuff’s just fog

and I’m dreaming to think I’ll ever

hunt with that dog

most of everything I see

is paint and flashing light

and the light of love is purer

but not near so bright

what

2.1190 : 8/5/08 : Troubles

Is this any way to

respond to troubles

as I’m marking time and

the stubble’s growing on my neck

if I had time to think

I’d nod at how things can stink

and I might get mad as heck

but when troubles come in torrents

I batten down

and despite your snide contempt

get my knees to the ground

You must live through it all

that’s the only rule

until your race is run

and you’re done with this school

what

2.1189 : 8/4/08 : Gape

3,380 : 25 ?

a thousand circles made of

wire and tape

towering structures fit to

make you gape

tension armatures

bakelite keys

pinioned joints like

insect knees

automatons of

dead end tech

clean as glass wings

not a speck

look inhuman

look unreal

mecha sunburst

under the peel

what

2.1188 : 8/3/08 : One More Thing

One more thing before I

fake some change again

rearrange again

those deck chairs on this

ill-starred boat

hell why not pretend

I’ll really pull it through

outfox or bull it through

swim somehow across the moat

what

2.1187 : 8/2/08 : The Book

In my heart that

irritating small voice

says by the book

maybe if you let me

find the damn thing

and take a look

I’ve heard about it

read about it even

ha ha funny

been told it’s not

about recognition

not about power

or money

So I’ll go by

my poor fake book

pretend not to

remember

what you left out

what you took

what

2.1186 : 8/1/08 : Work Backwards

Work backwards

start at the end and

imagine how such a thing could come about

think backwards

try to keep some friends that

will stick by you if it turns into a rout

I’m thinking of a suspicious method

will the authorities think this death odd?

the locked room the enigma

I think I’ve given up on self-concept

I think I’m resigned to mediocre and inept

I used to be a tau now I’m just a sigma

what