2.454 : 7/31/06 : Settle

At this point
I’d settle for anything
just tell me where to stand
just tell me what to bring
just tell me how to act
just tell me what to say
I’ll comb my ragged hair
I’ll hide inside to pray
this isn’t anything
I know just how things are
after a decade and a half
I know exactly just how far
pacing the rut gets you
work equals zero, zip
And I just try to keep my head down
So much for the hero trip

what

2.453 : 7/30/06 : Day One Again

2,644 : 59 ?


Day one again
a month to 35
years upon this orb
and still very much alive
this time very different
without flower or mushroom scroll
and with a pessimistic spirit
that exacts a heavy toll
I barely glance at what I wrote
I rarely see the point
I’m running on a bloody mind
eschew the universal joint
I hope it will get better soon
surely hoped that before
I’m hoping for a window
but I’ll settle for a door

what

2.452 : 7/29/06 : Far Behind

How does it all get
So far behind
day by day
one excuse at a time
I feel the answer
can’t be far behind now
but how long has that theory
been on my mind now
every day I say
today the change
the sepulchers I whitewash
the deck chairs rearranged
on this titanic
train wreck of a boat
in the valley of indifference
just echoes of the clearing of my throat

what

2.451 : 7/28/06 : White Hot Wire

Anger like a
white hot wire
insinuated
spread the fire
no outlet no
and no release
the wolf’s in the pasture
disguised in a fleece
seems nothing’s to
be done with it
I’m not done
and I cannot quit
The white hot wire
digs deeper still
today’s manifestation
of the bitter pill
says it’s harmful to
keep it bottled inside
but I’ve promises to keep
on this long long ride
I hold it down imperfectly
perhaps my saving grace
I know that they can read
the wire’s lash marks on my face

what

2.450 : 7/27/06 : Mail

I check the mail
by hand and electron
I keep thinking
it will deliver some gumption
it’s always bullshit
ads and bills
offers I can’t refuse
with alarming codicils
I try to write a letter
every day
I never send them
I’ve got nothing to say
I guess that’s probably
the reason for this drought
you can’t expect to get
what you don’t put out
The sign said every single thing
you seek is within
I knew I lied
when I said I was ready to begin
I’ll write that confession
on a postcard of a snail
And send it to the Emperor
by first class celestial mail

what

2.449 : 7/26/06 : Solipsistic

Being hopeful is not the
same thing as optimism
One seems to be necessary
the other merely solipsism
Being tall does not make you
into a basketball player
Using fancy words does not
make you a truth conveyer
I don’t want to be here
at all anymore
Getting through that is necessary
but it doesn’t really open the door
sufficient cause I have
enough I think to cease
but some sick hope inside of me
will not grant my release

what

2.448 : 7/25/06 : Resistance

What am I resisting
what’s making me kick
what’s the problem with just existing
when will something finally stick
waiting for enlightenment
waiting for a change
trying to get over this feeling of entitlement
waiting for something inside to rearrange
waiting for an answer
to fall down from on high
waiting for the perfect mood enhancer
waiting for you to cast the die
Me and my resistance
Plowing a hard row
Guess I’ve also got persistence
So this small refrain should show
sick of hopeful platitudes
Leave it on a down note
Just like it said in the beatitudes
but the sentiment stuck in my throat

what

2.447 : 7/24/06 : Can We Change

Can we really change at all?
Can we climb out of the hole
Can we halt another fall
Can we keep this world
from going down the tubes?
is it all just a show
for the partisan rubes?
Something small
try something smaller
I’ll never be younger
I’ll never be taller
Someday I might be richer
tomorrow I’ll be poorer
You can struggle with fate
but you can’t ignore her
I got a sick feeling in my heart
we’re gonna roll a long time yet
refusing to ask if we can change
what a rude surprise we’re gonna get

what

2.446 : 7/23/06 : This Silence

2,637 : 52 ?


This silence this solitude
isn’t my friend anymore
no more escape from the day today
feet planted on the floor
Messed from the first stroke
hoped I’d get better soon
the answer is still nowhere
better no nearer than the moon
there’s no monolith up there
there’s no sign from God
that’s no way to play this hand
You shouldn’t spare the rod
It’s not merely circumstance
I think it’s by design
I think that in a thousand years
I might just finally make it mine
Heard it all before you know
the silence that’s without
The restless chatter in my head
that tries to drown it out

what

2.445 : 7/22/06 : Flashback

Flashback backtrack
try to ignore the
television fractured fission
up to here with lore of
the early adopters
and black helicopters
It must be conspiracy
that got in between you and me
Made up as I went along
Another day another song
only wanted to be
weightless and free
I know I’ve been here before
through this tangle
through this door
catching up again doesn’t mean anything
Lose the thread pick it up
another stupid half full cup
It makes me sad
nothing in my hand I bring

what

2.444 : 7/21/06 : Pander

They’ve made a science of it
monetizing pandering
me I’m practically immune
my thoughts just keep meandering
More garbage I don’t want to watch
same shit different day
I’ve got no excuse for being up
And nothing to say when I pray
Nothing better than a couplet
never thought it’d take so long
I don’t like it when I feel this way
and I do not feel strong

what

2.443 : 7/20/06 : Worry ‘Bout the Government

Consumed by fantasies
revenge on the bastards
smash their fortresses
hoist them on their own petards
foolish, unchristian
drowning in bile
plagued by dark fantasies
helpless all the while
Is the solution
to turn the other cheek
will anything at all
be inherited by the meek
it looks to me like
the last stay last
and the first hang on like leeches
to their sumptuous repast
and what could one
ever hope to do
I worry ‘bout the government
the evils old and new
I’ll give myself an ulcer
I’ll give myself a stroke
Going crazy about everything
and ranting till I croak

what

2.442 : 7/19/06 : The New Rule

The new rule:
first things first above all
There’s no bigger picture
and there is no sacred wall
Energy and water
doesn’t seem so complicated
To reject the mass opinion
ignore how I get rated
it’s easy when I do it
it’s a hard row when I don’t
so I guess it’s all my problem
if I will or if I won’t
put aside thoughts of tomorrow
since it never ever comes
Just listen to today’s voice
keep marching to today’s drums
the new rule
Wonder how long it will last
I can only keep on rolling
as the todays roll into the past

what

2.441 : 7/18/06 : Start Something Up

I want to start something up
I don’t care what anymore
As long as it’s not another fight
as long as it’s not another war
A ship in a bottle would be
an act of sedition these days
Everything is so important
everybody everybody pays
They’re talking killing again
again they’re talking bombs
they’re talking rockets, viruses
North Korea, Lebanon
I just want to start some
pretty painting in my corner
build some pretty idol
with fresh flowers adorn her

what

2.440 : 7/17/06 : Bear With Me

Bear with me a little longer
please don’t give up hope
I’m trying very very hard
to play out enough rope
to the beast that dwells within
the demon in the details
I’m trying hard to send this
train of thoughts right off the rails
I try to take a cheerful aspect
try to prove my point
that nine times out of ten
the problem’s just time out of joint
but I can see the contrary
position that it’s always now
And I can see the point of
singing loudly from my gospel plow
I can adapt I swear it
learn a different trade
I’m searching searching searching for it
in this strange melange I’ve made

what

2.439 : 7/16/06 : Will Roll On

2,630 : 45 ?



The world will roll on I think
in its rutted track in its gravity sink
I won’t give up ever, no
As long as I’ve life and some way to go
We always think we’re in the central hour
we seem to believe in some persistence of power
but history tells a different tale
and we’re all staring blindly in the belly of the whale
It might string along a thousand pages
It might be prescribed across the ages
It might vanish in my own lifetime
I can’t tell if that would be such a crime
I heard the voice warn all out war
I had to wonder what it all was for
Nobody wins nobody wins again
this must be evil this must be sin

what

2.438 : 7/15/06 : Closing In

Circle circle circle round
this uplifting abstraction
circle round the symbol
rally round the grand distraction
I’ve got a feeling
that I’m closing in
I’ve had it before
and I’ve got it again
I can’t imagine one
reason to believe in it
but still there is this signal
and still I am receiving it
I’ll just keep
circling circling
I feel like Charlemagne
I feel like a king
Closing in on
the royal objective
the royal road to
my sole directive

what

2.437 : 7/14/06 : Dog Days (II)

Is it true that every
dog will have it’s day?
In my heart I
prayed it every day
let this be the one
let this be the last
the path I dreamed
all through my checkered past
The dog days are upon us
I couldn’t guess for how long
I’d like to say I’m ready I’d
be lying if I said
that I was going strong
but the sun it is a vampire
bleeding off my spark
and it’s so hard to stop
this trend of living in the dark

what

2.436 : 7/13/06 : Dog Days (I)

It’s just the heat
only the heat
Oppression of the atmosphere
it’s got me beat
the world warps like
a soggy mass
the sun is pressing down
infiltrating through the glass
plans are burned and wilted
intentions too
I thought for sure this weekend
I’d get with you
I thought for sure this once
I’d finally get it right
I thought I’d get a second wind
I thought I’d go all night

what

2.435 : 7/12/06 : The Anger Manifesto

It lashes out at every angle
hissing whipping menace
headless snake
control or redirect just cannot
eradicate this
grim road that I take
I need to ride that angry
river to it’s source
figure out where the rest go
fighting cannot be the answer
to the anger manifesto
I’ll permit five more
declarations
five more shouts of ire
I’ll allow another dies irae
before I consign it to the fire
It’s all me baby it’s all you
it’s all something
or the other
Anger remains
bright as a new penny
Anger and fear his brother

what

2.434 : 7/11/06 : These Lies

Seven hundred breakdowns
seven hundred shames
leading to another lost day
five hundred miles
the five thousand names
that I wrote down in my own way
I’ve got no answer no solutions
another rush that gutters, dies
I need an agency to
counter these pollutions
to speak truth to these lies

what

2.433 : 7/10/06 : Invoke Terror

Invoke terror, the never ending war
the story of the misery
laid up in store
this human race hasn’t
progressed one iota
turn on the television
fill your terror quota
I’m sick of this world
and I’m sick of this life
nobody told me it was
all mired down in stupid strife
nobody told me
it would go like this
it makes me crazy
really takes the piss
 
what

2.432 : 7/9/06 : I Lock the Wine

I lock the wine up
cause Johnny’s coming by
Not to deny and not to say
he’s not a stand up guy
but Johnny can’t resist the wine
or crank for that good matter
thank God I never have that round
I don’t dig on that spatter
I am an American
A master by my own lights
of setting down a line or ten
of setting things to rights
I’ll feed him beer till Kingdom Come
And he’s just so gosh darn charming
I’d have to call that Fun

what

2.431 : 7/8/06 : A Little There

A little here a little there
your little hobby faith
amuses me beyond compare
I act a dada nonsense verse
that turned you into
a devastating voodoo curse

what

2.430 : 7/7/06 : Circumcise My Heart

Can you cut off this unwieldy chunk
So I can finally start
This excess flesh I call a man
just circumcise my heart
I pray you make me holy
Lord till blood sweats from my pores
Declare it as a bill of rights
remove my conscience skin my words
then I will just be
Something convenient
Don’t be careful with me
don’t be lenient
circumcise my heart
and make me righteous in your sight
convince me to remember to
act like it will all turn out
all right

what

2.429 : 7/6/06 : Stealth Mode

I move so slowly
embracing every shadow
Lucky thing I lost weight
in the hole
I didn’t know
I could press that low
survivor mode
stealth mode
crazy tactics
I feel like such a toad
lifting it straight
out of conversation
am I invading
client privilege
of this privileged nation
It isn’t clear
So I keep it
very quiet
nightshade
grows from every crack
I’m on a steady diet

what

2.428 : 7/5/06 : Guess

Too many times to approach the thing
Too many times I appeal to a guess
I’ve got a notion I’ll get better soon
But I will seek no answer or redress
I know that each one here will die
I fear we’ll never know just why
I change the rules I know at every whim
But I believe whatever I said to him
That nothing would prevent a particle of Fate
Or move an inch across the horizon
I think the root of it all was not hate
indifference is what I’ve got my eyes on

what

2.427 : 7/4/06 : Gaps

Gaps between teeth, signs of times
said it over a thousand same old rhymes
Powerful impact explains worst causes
I’ve lost track of my exit strategies and escape clauses
Is this the same old I can’t tell
Don’t consider me vain if I say I do it well
It’s said that it’s all cryptic it’s said it’s a ruse
I say you better stand back if you light my fuse
Ah yes now I remember well
I’ve never been so meek and mild over that farewell
America is still out there I heard him say
Another load to hoist on your trebuchet
So now it’s back to this routine I guess it works
It’s not without it’s charms or hidden perks
From gaps to ghastly synapses
From quick to very dead
I guess it’s what I meant to say
I guess it’s what I said

what

2.426 : 7/3/06 : Rolling Home

It’s fun to have a day away
it’s fun to mix things up and play
but in the end I always want
to be rolling home
There’s spectacle
and liquor store
a fancy meal
the club de jour
But after that you’ll find me
purely rolling home
I have to leave my heart behind
if wandering gets on my mind
but what it asks
pays twice in kind
that’s why I’m rolling home
‘cross the muddy past the tracks
I’m always finding my way back
be it a mansion or a shack
I only want to be
rolling home

what

2.425 : 7/2/06 : Wrong Rabbit

2,616 : 31 ?


Follow that rabbit
catch him if you can
crashing through the shrubs and hedges
think you’ve got him
my good man
whoops he slips out of your grasp
on the hunt once more
but what’s up with this rabbit hole
it has a little door
knock three times to be polite
and then just dive in after
I gotta say around the bend
that sounds like bunny laughter
wait a second didn’t she say
he was supposed to be white
I think we’ve got the wrong rabbit
and are about to see the light

what

2.424 : 7/1/06 : Roll

It may just be
Playing a role for you
but not for me
I am rolling now
and it’s easy
It’s difficult to write
and not stay up
too late at night
but to roll along
comes naturally to me
if it seems all much the same
blame Dante and his little game
of circles within circles
bound to hell to get at heaven
I’m just rolling unconcerned
testing what I may have learned
it’s going well and I
will get there before eleven

what